•Chapter 43•

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"That's Alex," I coughed. I always did that when I fangirled. But the thing was, this was different. All five of them just stood there. Real. They were real. "Fuck, I don't think I can do this."

"You'll be fine," Logan's voice sounded from behind me. It was odd, it felt like I hadn't talked to Logan in a while. I turned to see him looking as good as ever.

"You think so?" I raised both my eyebrows and stifled a laugh. "Logan. I cried when their album came out last month."

"That's understandable," Terrence replied, leaning his arm on Logan's shoulder.

We both looked at him.

"What?" Terrence shrugged. "After we saw Devin in public and you freaked out I decided to look up their music and damn I would fuck all of them so hard."

We were still looking at Terrence.

"Hey, no judging," Terrence shook his index finger at us. "This is a judge-free zone, okay?"

"Do you have something to tell us, Terrence?" Lohan asked jokingly.

Terrence huffed,"Fuck off, Logan."

"Okay, okay," I took the deepest breath I could and exhaled for a elongated period of time. "I'm going to say hi."

I slowly but surely made my way over to the five boys who had caused the end result of my calculus grade to be a C. They were talking about something when I go within hearing distance, but Alex looked at me first.

Don't panic, don't panic, make like All Time Low and dON'T PANIC.

"Um, h-hi," I squeaked. "Uh, I'm a...I mean, I'm a friend of -"

"Oh!" Devin interrupted. "You're Jess, right?"

...LIKE A DEER IN THE LIGHTS OF AN ONCOMING BUS.

"Yes?" I answered in a question.

"Yeah, Logan told us about you," Wesley, the Irish one, my weakness, my cupcake, replied, leaning on Alex's shoulder. "You're the actress girl."

"Yeah, uh-huh," I nodded stupidly. I didn't know how to act around them. Especially since they were plastered on my walls at home and took up 81 songs on my iPhone.

"That thing you're doing is really fucking cool," Alex, my favorite, smiled, his dimples becoming more apparent.

"And you're really fucking glorious," I sighed, then stopped breathing. "Shit, I just...I just said that..."

"Out loud?" Alex chuckled. "Yeah, you did, babe."

"Can I have a picture?" I asked, dying to change the subject. They all agreed. And when they all gathered to take a group picture with me, Alex whispered, "Can I have a picture with you?"

Of course I agreed after almost choking on my tongue, but I had to ask why he wanted one.

"You'll be famous one day," Alex winked. "I want the world to know that I knew you first."

Had Alex from Distant Melody just flirted with me or is that just my Fangirl fantasies taking flight into the clouds?

They walked away, their manager summoning them into some room. Logan and Terrence were smirking at me as I approached them.

"You're red," Terrence snorted.

"You're annoying," I retaliated.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?" Logan asked, pretty much shooing Terrence away. I nodded, feeling my heart rate pick up when his hand brushed up against mine. I had forgotten how much I had missed him.

But it's like a sad teen novel. I can't be with him. Forbidden love at its best.

"What is it?" I looked down at my shoes instead of into his hazel eyes.

"I can't do this," Logan's voice wavered. This made me look up at him. He looked tired. And really worn out. "Just watching you walking around and talking to Damien -"

"Damien?" I laughed. "You're jealous of Damien? Logan, we just broke up. I'm not over you and I never will be."

But Damien isn't so bad.

"I don't know, Jess," he shrugged. "I just miss you, that's all."

"I miss you, too," I mumbled.

Logan looked in my eyes, then down at my lips.

And then he kissed me.

I wanted to pull away. No, I felt like I owed it to him to pull away; to not lead him on. But the way our mouths moved in perfect sync...I just let him pull away when he wanted.

"I...I'm sorry," Logan stepped away. "I didn't...fuck, Jess. I'm sorry."

He rushed off, but I didn't leave the spot where I was. The windows taking up the wall on the right of me made the sun feel warm on my cheeks. Logan had just kissed me. And we were technically broken up. I glanced at the garden.

Damien.

He was looking at me, his hand covered in dirt, and his expression told me that he had seen everything that had just happened.

***

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