Still Gotta Mean Something

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Rick's POV

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Rick's POV

"What did you do?"

Droplets of blood ran down my face, dripping from my eyelashes as I blinked rapidly at her. She was horrified but I wasn't. I did what had to be done, what was supposed to be done. Or was it... something else. No, I did this. They don't get to live, not after everything.

"Answer me!" She yelled, panting through her disgust.

"I killed 'em."

10 Hours Before

Her touch was the warmth I needed. It always felt so cold without her, like I could barely breathe. Even more so now.

"Did you read your letter yet?" Bella asked softly from her deep pink lips.

My grief was swallowing me whole; Carl was everything, he was the future. Now... he's just gone.

"I- I can't." My words trembled on their own as I shifted uncomfortably on the box I was sat on, allowing Bella more room to reattach my armoured plate.

Once she was done, she crouched down to me and landed just below my shoulders. "Baby..." She said through light breath, trailing the tips of her fingers through my growing stubble. I felt my brow tighten as I pushed further into her touch, wishing it could linger forever. "You can't run from this. If you try it'll only catch up an by that point, it'll eat you alive."

I just need time.

"I know." I leant my forehead against hers. "What're you gonna do now?"

"I don't know. I can't go back to the Saviors till I get Negan 'cause if I do... Simon will have me killed. An I can't get Negan till I figure- well, I just can't get him yet."

"What if Jadis kills him before you get to him?" I wondered.

"She won't. She's been in communications with another settlement- I don't know what it is yet, but she doesn't want to kill him. She wants to trade him an that won't happen till tomorrow now." She paused, reflecting on the pain she could always seem to sense in others. "She's lost everything she ever loved. She's lost her family. She needs purpose and we can give her that." My wife said with such hope.

I on the other hand was reluctant. "She's double crossed us every chance she's had. I'm not takin' anymore chances."

"Rick... she has nobody left." I didn't say anything to her words, which prompted her to continue. "There was a time when I had nobody. There was a time when you had nobody either."

"That was different—"

"No, it wasn't. Jadis has made bad choices but every decision she made was for her people, just like ours have been." Bella reasoned and I knew she was right, of course I did. But it was still different... somehow. "It's no different. You'll see that with time, just like I have."

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