Finding Myself; The Man in The Mirror

Chapter 28 "Janet and George"

This chapter is dedicated to two people who have said some transphobic remarks. One being a coworker and the other being a family member.

Let's start with "Janet" of course "Janet" isn't her really name considering there is an investigation going on in the matter. Which I will explain more later in in this chapter.

"Janet" is one of the supervisors I work with. Now I don't work with her all the time but when I do she has been dead naming me. So I took it upon myself to talk my manager about it.

So I went and talked to him explaining how I felt like she was being disrespectful and not respecting what I want to go by. So he said he was going to talk to her.

The next day when I went in he explained that he did talk to her but the way he talked she wasn't going to call me Tobias. So when I saw her that day she didn't say anything to me. Okay whatever be petty.

On Christmas day she came in at noon to work. I was there until three thirty. It was busy but hey whatever. At a little after noon I went on break. Well Amy one of my coworkers was going to leave. Now I haven't really discussed with Amy what I wanted to be called so when Amy was leaving she said "Merry Christmas Sheila." Before I could even respond to her I hear "Janet" say "Now don't say that your going to get into trouble." Like seriously? I was upset and angry. I wanted to say something so bad. I just bit my tongue. I let it go and went about my day.

Well I was waiting on a customer I heard "Janet" say over the walkie "Sheila don't charge him for his drink." Like seriously?! I had to bite my tongue again. 

I confided into "B" about the whole situation and how it was pissing me off. "B" informed me that "Janet" made the statement that it wasn't my legal name. Therefore she wasn't going to call me Tobias. So of course that pissed me off more.

So the next day I ended up calling the 800 number to file a formal complaint. The lady asked me all sorts of questions and I gave her my answers. She asked me if I wanted to remain anonymous. I was like nope my name is going to be known so they know exactly who said something. I have to wait 5-7 days and I can check back to see if there any progress.

The last time I had to call the 800 number the person I called it on ended up getting fired! Do I want "Janet" fired. I mean it be nice but I would just settle for her calling me Tobias. Being talked to by the boss wasn't enough for her to do it. So I had to go above him.

Now onto "George". "George" is well the man that stepped up when my so called father stepped down.  Well I overheard him and my mom talking about me. Mom was like you need to start saying Tobias. His response was "well that's not on her birth certificate." Wow really? You can accept the fact I came out as a lesbian but being transgender is a different story!!!!!!

My sister asked me later on if I heard what he said. I said yeah. So she heard it too. She was pissed as well. Like it's not okay. I didn't say anything. I wanted to but sometimes my anger gets the best of me. I wanted to go off. Like the fuck?!

I know transphobia is a real thing. I hate thinking that the man I called Dad is transphobic. I wish it wasn't real. It's sad it is and I'm experiencing it.