Down the line

29 - Superheroes

I think I owe you guys this one.

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CLEM POV

I heard the gunfire. I heard it all. I didn't know where April was, which concerned me. But I knew both of my boys would be on the front line.

I wanted to be there with them, to help them. But I know Lewis would just usher me back home. I'm sure they'll be fine.

I begin to pace about the house. I still hated this house slightly, it wasn't reception. I missed reception. Some people would say I need to stop thinking about Josh, but I never can. He's always on my mind. Everyday.

I would always remember our little conversations and laugh. They were entertaining and I enjoyed them. All of the jokes he would say. He always found some way to make me laugh.

I walked into Lewis' temporary room and sat down on the bed. Lewis reminded me too much of a younger Josh, how he would want everything to be perfect for everyone else. Josh would try hard, sometimes too hard.

Sitting on Lewis' bed and looking around the room made me feel insecure. This didn't feel real. I just wanted all of my children, safe. I wanted my husband back.

Even though it had been 2 years it still drove me crazy. Sometimes I found myself speaking to him when he's not even there, hoping that somewhere, somehow he can hear every word.

Maybe he could see how his children have grown? What people they will and have become? We always used to wonder these things, even before children.

I laid on the bed and stared at the ceiling. I held a rifle beside me. Just in case. They told us all to have weapons. I wouldn't trust them to not come into the South side of Wellington.

If the end of Wellington came soon. It would definitely be now. I shut my eyes and think about all of my past.

My parents, Lee, everyone in the journey, the walkers, Luke, Turner, Josh and now ultimately just Wellington altogether.

I rolled over and stared at the bedside drawer. My curiosity got the better of me as I reached over and pulled it open. Expecting to find underpants, condoms and tissues I was surprised when the only thing in there was scruffy book.

Maybe the things I was expected was stuff you'd find in Lee's draw. Apart from the fact we no longer had condoms. Expirations are a serious thing. I chuckled slightly at my thoughts.

I picked up the book. It looked at if it had been dried out from some sort of water damage. Maybe Lewis had spilt a drink on it or something? However, the book didn't have a title on the front if it and it somewhat looked familiar.

I know I had seen the book before. I sat up and brushed off the battered front. It was only when I opened the first page that I recognised the handwriting. Josh.

"Holy shit." I mumbled as I stared at the book. It was Josh's diary.

Why would Lewis keep this from me for so long? Did he put it here for me to find? I couldn't help but sit and cry, I didn't feel as if I should read it. Did Josh ever want me to see it?

"So...what are you doing?" I crawl across the bed towards Josh and wrap my arms around his neck before planting a kiss on his cheek.

Josh was sat on the bed with that book he always scribbles in by his legs. He quickly shut it when I came across. I had just put the boys to bed.