TW: chaos, fighting, crying, self harm
Onika
I'm in the laundry room curled up in a ball on the floor. My sobs shake my entire body and I put my hand over my mouth to keep myself quiet.
I'm hiding from Megan.
I don't know if I should even call her that because she doesn't feel like my Megan anymore. Feels like a stranger squatting in my own home.
I hear her in our bedroom crying louder than I am.
All of those things getting brought back to the surface have been getting to her. I understand. The internet is cruel. Megan knows that but still surfs the internet.
Her manager agreed she would keep her in the know of business stuff so she wouldn't have to go on social media herself. Megan agreed but still logs on.
I honestly don't know how to help her.
I get up at the quietness because I'm sure something is up.
I walk into the room and she's sobbing and trying to rummage around. She hasn't noticed me yet. She gives up on looking for whatever and then starts slamming things and then moves to sit on the floor of the bathroom and bang her head on the wall.
"MEGAN, No!" I dive and put my hands around her head to stop her but she tries to fight my grip.
"Onika, get away Im a shitty ass fuckin' person!" She screams. "Get away!"
"No! No, I'm not gonna give up on you!"
"Why not?!?! Onika I'm ran through!"
"That's not true though! You and I both know that! I told you to shut that phone off! At least delete the apps!"
Megan closes her eyes and puts her hands over her face and this time tries to slam her head back with all of her force.
"Stop!" I get insanely nervous and try to move her away but her foundation is strong. "Baby, please! Please."
"Onika, just leave me."
"I won't fuckin' leave you. You clearly need someone!"
"I don't need you!"
In that moment my everything drops. I know she doesn't mean it and that she's talking out of her ass out of anger, but it gets to me.
I'm quiet and stop yelling back.
I just help her up in one swift force and move her to the bed. She's already in pajamas.
"You stay here."
Megan has tears running down her face and her cheeks and under eyes are puffy. I get her a water bottle.
I come back to find her curled up in the bed with the blankets surrounding her. She's breathing quickly and heavy but at least she stopped hitting her head so hard.
"Shhhhh. It's okay." I whisper a little.
I hand her the bottled water, trembling a bit.
Dare, I say I'm a bit afraid of her and for her.
Megan is the best person to ever cross my path in this life. She's far from the worst.
"You wanna be alone?"
"Please." She says quietly.
I go to the kitchen and decide to start washing up some dishes as I hear her sob. It hurts. I want to engulf her in all the hugs and kisses possible but she doesn't want that.
I'm not sure how to help Megan at this point.
