Office Hours |h.s|

seventy seven

Cassidy

"Any luck?" I ask Will as we reconvene in front of the library building.

He shakes his head, shoving his hands deep into his pockets. "Nothing. I looked everywhere, asked everyone, nobody's seen her all weekend."

"Fuck! I should've gone with her-"

"Babe, don't blame yourself..." Noah sighs, wrapping an arm around me to try and comfort me.

When Maude didn't come home that night, I tried not to go to the worst case scenario. I told myself she was just spending the night with the guy who got her pregnant, and that they had a lot to figure out. I couldn't just expect her to go over there for like an hour and then come back like nothing happened. As much as I want to keep Maude in this little bubble of support, I knew telling the father of the baby was important and I was proud of her for going.

But then the next day came and went without a word from Maude. I tried calling her a million times with no luck. Naturally I panicked, since men don't exactly have the best track-record of being supportive of an unexpected or unwanted pregnancy. I recruited Will to help look for her today, since I know he's really good friends with her too, I just left out the pregnancy part since it's not my place to tell him.

We spent the entire day out as it snowed, looking for any sign of Maude or my car. The longer we went without finding her or hearing from her, the more this bad feeling in my stomach grew.

"I should have made her give me an address or a name. What if she's hurt or dead? We don't even know where to start looking!"

Will's eyes shift from me and Noah, to the ground. He presses his lips together and I can tell he's keeping something. "What, Will?"

He sighs, rubbing his forehead. "Look, I know who the guy she's been seeing is and I passed by his place. The car wasn't there."

"You know who she's been seeing? Well this is great, we have a name so we can go to the police and file a missing person's report! Who was it?"

His eyes shift anxiously around, "Not here. Let's go back to your place and we'll talk there. If you're saying something might have happened to her, I'd rather be safe than sorry."

We all head back to our cars, Noah and I getting into his car while Will jumps into his own. My heart pounds and I nervously rub my hands over and over. I trust Maude and her judgment, but right now she's not Maude. She's scared and vulnerable and I don't want anyone to take advantage of that.

"Cass, she's gonna be okay. We're gonna find her." Noah reaches over, squeezing my hands in his. He's worried too. He was out until almost five in the morning looking for her by himself because he couldn't sleep. Maude has to be okay.

"What if this guy hurt her? And I just gave her my car and sent her off by herself? I don't know him, I don't know if he's been hurting her already... Men kill their pregnant girlfriends, it happens, Noah. You know Maude, she's too forgiving when it comes to guys and it's gotten her hurt in the past."

Maude has been through more than people think. They see her and they see a rich girl who is a bit promiscuous but independent and motivated. They see her pretty smile and nice body. But they don't see the pain behind her eyes. They don't know how many times I've had to pick up the pieces for her after some guy beat the shit out of her, or how she still sometimes has to come sleep in my bed because she's so traumatized by some relationships that she has horrible nightmares. She hides that from the world.

She deserves to be with someone who treats her right and loves her. She deserves a chance to know what true love is and how it feels. I want her to have what Noah and I have, a healthy and loving relationship, and I know deep down she wants that too. That's why she falls for guys so easily. A lot of the time I keep my mouth shut, just trying to be happy for her the best I can be until things go to shit and I pull her out of there.