*41 1/2. this perspective again

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THIS PERSPECTIVE AGAIN

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THIS PERSPECTIVE AGAIN

✧・゚: * Max Mayfield is totally in love with Nora Harrington.

Not to be dramatic or anything, but she literally has been since the beginning of time.

Seriously, Max has never believed in stuff like destiny - she's a firm supporter of the idea that we make our own fate - but she also thinks the only reason she could possibly even be put on this planet in the first place is to love Nora.

Nora is everything Max needs in her life. It just all feels so right when they're together.

But Max also knows that Nora cares about her more than the redhead thinks she deserves.

Max isn't sure if she can put label "love" on it yet, but even when she did everything in her power to push Nora away, she was still always there for her.

And she could never find herself complaining about that or anything! But Max just never felt. . . worthy of Nora.

She knew she was messed up. She knew growing up with her parents always fighting did something to her, she knew her mom's alcoholism affected her more than she lets on, she knew Billy affected her more than she lets on.

She knew at some point, one way or another, she was going to hurt Nora. And it didn't matter if they got back together after it or not, because the last thing Nora deserves is to be hurt at all.

But then her heart gets in the way of her brain, and she simply can't help herself from holding Nora's hand and looking at her as though she's the only girl in the world.

Max decided that after Billy, she really had to stop messing with Nora's feelings like that. She decided she just needed to stop hanging out with her. Stop being tempted. And even if it would hurt in the beginning - for both of them - it was for the best.

Then, California happened. Max felt a whole new person there, with her dad and a new skateboard he had gotten her.

The redhead wasn't planning on meeting up with the others at the roller skating place originally, but she let her brain think that maybe, maybe this time, things would be different. It'd be better. She could handle it.

And then something about El being picked on invoked the feeling of grief, and anger, and sadness, and terror all mixed together in Max's stomach, and Nora brushed their arms together and looked at Max as though she was expecting something from her, and Max just couldn't handle it.

She knows it's unfair, she knows she's being annoying and mean, but she feels a lump in her throat whether she's with Nora or without her, so she'd rather just not drag Nora down with her, y'know?

But, she loves her.

She loves her laugh and how much of a nerd she is. She loves how easygoing she is but isn't hesitant to get passionate about the things and people who she cares about. She loves how she's a cheerleader and still plays Dungeons and Dragons - no matter how much Max acts like she hates it - because she loves how Nora is always just following her own schedule without a care in the world about what other people think of her.

And she's going to tell her. Maybe not in so many words, because that gives things more of a chance of getting awkward really fast, but she's going to tell Nora how she feels.

No more backing out, no more pretending to do things for the greater good when really it's just because Max is scared and a coward.

She's going to tell Nora she loves her.





















































a/n:
sadie sink x me when
also the end of this chapter is kinda misleading ur going to have to wait a little longer for a love confession 🙂🙂

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