oh come on | twd

• Company •

A few days had passed, and everything was calm. Glenn continued to take more leadership when going on runs, which we were all grateful of, especially since Aiden had no idea what he was doing out there. Me and Carl hadn't spoke of what happened and it was driving me insane.

I stood with Tyreese and Michonne, silently listening to their conversation. They knew I was there, I simply just wanted their company and they didn't mind. Judith babbled in Tyreese's arms, and he seemed so content in her company that it warmed my heart.

"They should be back by now," Michonne spoke quietly and I didn't know if it was to prevent me from hearing or just from the pure concern that laced her words.

"They'll be fine as long as Glenn's in charge, they might've just ran into a few walkers," Tyreese replied and it suddenly dawned on me.

Glenn, Tara and Noah had went on a run with Nicholas and Aiden and not since returned. I had faith in them though, Glenn and Tara knew how to look after themselves, and Noah, although being in the hospital for a long time with Beth, knew how to handle himself.

"Me and Judith are gonna go play for a bit, you coming?" Tyreese said and it took a moment for me to realise he was even talking to me until Michonne nudged me.

"Me? I uh, need to do something but maybe later?"  I declined and Tyreese nodded.

He left with Judith and I found myself leaving also. I didn't know what to do today, especially with what was going on with Carl. I went back home and went to the room that had been given to me. My bag was on the chair and I opened it, checking for my knife and grabbed it. I attached my knife holster to my dad's belt and put it on.

I didn't know why I'd decided to go out, but climbing the walls proved to be less of a challenge than I anticipated it to be. Landing was a bit of an issue; I had to roll a bit to help distribute the blow. I made a quick dash to the trees and forced my way through some branches and into the woods. I could hear a clock or alarm somewhere nearby, and narrowed my eyes. Before I could pinpoint the source of the noise however, it stopped, and it was silent.

Unsure of what my plans were, I held my knife tightly and trekked further. The groans of the dead were quiet at first but grew louder and I saw a small group heading towards a fixed direction. When I looked closer, I could see a tree that didn't look right, and when I focused further I saw Carl in a small hole inside of it. Carl and Enid, pressed together in a small hole whilst walkers stumbled passed obliviously. Eventually, all the walkers were gone, yet they stayed the same.

I felt my heart sink, and turned and left. He was safe so there was no point staying. My knife tight in my hand, I began to head deeper in the woods, away from home. There was a tiny opening in the woods with logs that had clearly been intentionally placed to be a small seating area. It was mossy though, with greenery growing out of the logs displaying it's neglect and abandonment.

I sat on the log, and began to stab at it with my knife, carving out chunks of wood and flicking it away with the end of the blade. It was silly to feel so upset and irritated by such a small thing. Maybe it was just the fact I'd been forgotten about, and replaced with someone he never cared to give an interest in before. Or maybe it was just the bitter feeling of not being the first person he decided to go with.

I didn't know anymore, and my blade began to not so delicately carve my name into the wooden surface. I admired the choppy letters which spelt 'LIA' and contemplated carving other people's name as well. They'd have to be easy to do, so I settled with Beth. The 'B' was harsh and pointy, contrasting her as a whole entirely, but I quite liked the way her name looked on it. I added more names, like Daryl's and Tara, Glenn and Abe. Rosita's was a pain to do, as was Maggie's because of the awkwardness carving of the G's. Eventually, everyone's name was now carved onto this log, each with their own appearance and harshness. Some of them I had to go over again and make more prominent.

I felt relieved afterwards, like they'd always be around in their own way, whether they were on a run or simply just weren't around. It was weird how I barely spoke to Rick and admired him for bringing together such a great family of people; a family who cared and loved each other so deeply. Even though I didn't feel as deserving to be part of the family, I knew I was still there.

——————

I only had to fight one walker on the way back into Alexandria, but it was enough for a tiny splatter of blood to make its way onto my face and clothes. When I got back however, Rick was already waiting for me at the gate.

"We've been looking for you, you alright?" He was quick to ask me how I was, and I nodded.

"Yeah, I needed a walk," I answered.

"You stay inside these walls, okay? There's places to walk inside but you've got no business out there," he seemed angry, the way he spoke all to familiar with me.

"Why? I can look after myself and you know I can."

"Amelia." His voice was stern and I silenced myself immediately.

Eye contact. Face. Body. Look like how I need to. His face shifted as he looked at me, scanning my face and I felt so familiar it scared me. He broke eye contact, turning to rub his face and I stayed planted in spot, staring at him as he paced a little.

"Tara got hurt," he said.

"What do you mean 'hurt'? What happened, where is she?" I answered, my act of stone coldness nearly dropping instantly.

"The infirmary."

I was ready to run there, but was stopped quickly by Rick. He grabbed my hand quickly, spinning me back around and my gaze dropped to his hand. He let go and I looked back up at him, expectant of what he stopped me for.

"What happened didn't just hurt her," he began and my heart rate beat faster. "Noah's gone," his voice was solemn.

I swallowed. Noah is the only thing showing that what Beth sacrificed was worth it. How can that matter now that he's gone?

"And Glenn?" My voice broke but no tears fell.

"He's at the infirmary with Tara but he's okay. I don't know how close you were with with Noah but I know you both went through the same thing at Grady's. I'm sorry Lia."

I nodded, making my way there without another word. I heard him walk away also, and if I wasn't set on a war path then I'd probably be confused at why he wasn't with them.

——————

"So you're telling me, Nicholas is the reason Noah is dead, and he gets to stay behind these walls? Stay breathing?" I spoke angrily to Glenn, but quietly as to not draw attention.

"I don't like it either," he sighed.

"I mean, fuck! He was the only thing showing that what Beth sacrificed was worth it. And Nicholas threw it all away!" I kicked the cupboard, and ran my hand through my knotted hair.

"Hey, hey, we got you from that hospital because of Beth, not just Noah," Glenn comforted and I scoffed loudly.

"Oh and that's such a relief! How does Noah get to die like that and Nicholas live?" My voice was a mix between a slight waver and then back to its normal state.

Glenn didn't answer, and I clenched my jaw hard when I heard a small knock on the door. I looked through the glass and saw it was Carl. I scoffed.

"I'm glad you're okay Glenn," was all I said before I left, practically ripping open the door and storming past Carl without another word.