Kaz Brekker imagines

She Kept Him Human

Kaz tore his eyes away from the papers sprawled across his desk when he heard the heavy wooden door creak open. Familiarity settled in his chest as Y/N padded across the floor grabbed his blanket off his bed and curled into the window seat next to his desk. His eyes scanned over her figure taking in her appearance. Her hair was a mess, sticking up in all directions most likely from her tossing and turning. Her slightly red eyes and dark circles. She wrapped the blanket around herself tightly, bringing her knees up to her chest as she rested her head against the cold window. He watched the lights from the building reflect in her eyes as she scanned the city as if looking for a distraction.

No words were exchanged between the two as a comfortable silence settled around the pair. This wasn't an uncommon occurrence and at this point, Kaz looked forward to the nights she made her way to his room. The reasons for her coming up always varied between being bored, not being able to fall asleep, or having nightmares. He was always able to tell given her mood and appearance. Tonight was nightmares. He knew eventually they would talk about it but he waited till she was ready. Till the vacant look faded from her eyes and she felt present again.

He finished signing a few papers and placed them aside, trying to draw his attention away from the girl beside him. Finally, a sigh slipped past her lips as she turned to face him, "Thank you."

"Don't thank me for nothing." He watched her lips curl into a small, tired smile. "You know it's not nothing to me." He tilted his head to the side in a slight nod before he stood and moved to his washroom.

Y/N watched him slide his gloves off and run the tap water over his hands before splashing his face. He was quick to dry off and make his way back to his chair, leaving his gloves on his sink. His eyes met hers with patient expectation and that was her sign he was ready to listen.

"I miss them so much." She spoke with her voice muffled behind her knees as she rested her face against her blanket-clad legs. He didn't ask who she was talking about since most of her nightmares were the same thing. The death of her parents.

"I don't know why I can't get the images out of my mind..." She sighed, "Okay well it's not a completely unreasonable thing, but it's driving me mad, Kaz." She looked at him, her eyes started to tear up, "I could've-"

"Don't." He cut her off before she could go down the familiar spiral. "We've been down that road and we both know it leads nowhere. Don't start yourself on that. You couldn't have done anything, Y/N."

She inhaled sharply and blinked rapidly. To anyone else, his words would've come across harsh and insensitive, but to Y/N they were comforting and a reminder that she wasn't alone. He knew her just as she knew him. He would be there for her in her weakest moments just as she was there for him. It was a mutual thing that had grown on them over time, it was them.

"I know, I know." Her voice sounded heavy but Kaz could tell she was composed, letting go of those memories. Her mind wasn't haunted anymore and was ready to fall back into a peaceful sleep. Silence filled the room once more as a yawn slipped through Y/N's lips. "Can I...?" She pointed to his bed and he only nodded before turning back to his desk. She was quick to walk to his bed and curl up under the blanket, burying her nose into his pillow while inhaling deeply. A feeling of warmth spread through his chest as he watched her actions discreetly. Knowing the fact that she found comfort in him, he managed to convince himself that he might not be the monster he thought he was. At least not completely. Not with her around. She kept him human, and he was silently grateful.