Chapter Nine - You Should Really Learn to Knock

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I lay in bed tossing and turning. Tikki is comfortably asleep after we discussed for over an hour all my feelings about Adrien and the amazing time I had with him today.

Yet, as I'm trying to sleep, I can't stop thinking about how Chat Noir didn't come visit tonight. I guess I've just been getting used to him showing up in the evening to keep me company. It's just been a few nights and despite that insignificant little time I feel so dependent on Chat for some peace.

This isn't okay. I don't understand what this means, but between wanting to kiss him last night, and now wishing for him to show up, I can't get him out of my head. I should be absolutely frothing at the mouth over my day with Adrien today, not wishing for another boy to come keep me company.

Maybe I scared him off last night.

I quietly get out of bed, not wanting to bother Tikki. Making my way to my desk, I stare at the jacket I've been too upset to work on for weeks. Reaching for the material, my hand begins to shake. There's too much to decide right now, and I'm still so young. It's crazy to think that I'm supposed to pick my lifelong career at this age. Within the next few months. It's almost September, and I need to start applying to colleges no later than December.

I don't want to go.

I really don't want to go.

I want to stay here, stay with my friends, stay with Adrien. Stay being Ladybug, stay with Chat Noir. Stay with Tikki.

I can't do all of that though. It's physically impossible to have it all. Everyone is going to leave, and I'm either going to join them and say goodbye to my life here, or I'm going to be left behind.

Strong arms wrap around me, and I notice I've been crying. I gasp but immediately relax into the embrace. Chat Noir did come after all.

"You should really learn to knock." I say softly, tears soaking my cheeks.

"You should really learn to be more aware of your surroundings. Are you okay?" He says, his tone the most comforting sound I've ever heard.

"Honestly? No." I sniffle, aggressively wiping away my tears. I'm so sick of being so emotional, especially in front of Chat Noir. If he were to ever find out that I'm Ladybug, he'll be so horrified. To think that the strong, powerful and confident Ladybug is truly such a weak, pathetic young girl. He'd be happy he never dated me.

He'll wish he got all those years pining after Ladybug back, so he can focus on someone better.

"I'm here for you, Marinette. Not because I need to be, because I want to. You're going through a hard time, and everything is scary right now. But I promise you that it will all be okay eventually." He says this so gently in my ear, still embracing me, his chest pressed against my back while I hide my face behind my hands.

I twist to stare at him. He's such a good person, through and through. I want to tell him that, and explain to him that he's the best hero in all of Paris. To tell him that Ladybug is nothing without him. That I'm nothing without him.

An Akuma floats into the room and I gasp, scrambling back from Chat Noir as terror takes over. Hawkmoth will know who I am if he gets ahold of me!

He'll get Chat too, right in front of me. I can't let that happen!

"Marinette, stay calm! Focus on me, everything is okay!" Chat says, panic lacing his features. I stare into his eyes, breathing in an out. When the Akuma takes control, I grit my teeth and stare at Chat Noir only.  It's a weird and uncomfortable sensation as I will ever fibre of my body to fight it off. It's slightly painful, like something is squeezing me and I can't move.

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