A Friendship Lost

30 - For You

Jennifer's POV

Months have passed since Leah has moved out, back to her house. She's giving Angelo a second chance and so far it seems like it's going well for them. Ben practically lives at my house now, his kids got a room for themselves too.

Ben and I are still in love the same way we were in the beginning. Maybe just for one difference. We feel way more secure. I feel way more secure.

„How's the sex?", I ask Leah. We're currently out for lunch, just me and her.
„Good.", she answers shortly which feels weird.

„Leah...", I raise my brows at her.  „Are you even having sex?"

She inhales deeply.
„We do. It's alright."
„Baby, if it's not... it seems like you're forcing yourself through this. Why?"
„How do you know? You don't know what's going on between us."

„No, I don't. Because you rarely tell.", I accuse her.
We used to talk a lot more, go into details of practically everything. Now we don't as much, which is not my fault. If I tell her about Ben, she seems uninterested. If I ask about Angelo, I'm getting random answers.

Leah sighs again. „Because I don't wanna be blamed..."

Leah's POV

„Blamed for what?", Jennifer asks me.
„Trying.."
Jennifer gets up and sits next to me on the bench I'm sitting on.

„And you think I blame you for that?"
I shrug my shoulders.
„I don't know."

„Baby..", she cups my face. „I don't blame you for anything. I just hate when we're not honest with each other. You can tell me everything. Always."

I try to look down but she doesn't let me. Her hands hold my face up.
„Please.", she says.

My heart starts beating faster looking into her eyes. All these months didn't change a thing. I had hoped so bad for the feeling to go away. All I wanna do right now, is kiss her. I'd give anything for her.

I nod and she pulls me into her arms.
I hold her close and enjoy her warm body on mine. We stay like this for a while.

The next day I see photos of us, how she cups my face and how we hug, on instagram. I don't even pay attention to the captions. I softly run my fingers over her face... Damn.

Damn... I hope Angelo doesn't see those. He's gonna be reminded of me cheating with her. They still haven't spoken since he stormed into her house. I think it's for the best, for now.

I sigh and get out of bed to take a shower. After I'm done, I see an instagram message from Jenn. She has send me one of those pictures of us.

„Look! They're saying we look hot together. 😌"

I type back „😂"

„We do tho. If they only knew, right? 😏😄"

A stich to my heart, then it jumps and picks up speed.

„Right 😂"

I put the phone away. Why doesn't it go away, why can't I just see her as a friend? We went out just yesterday and I miss her already. And there's nothing I could possibly do about it. I want her touch, I... what if we would have sex..? Just one more time? Maybe I'm satisfied after? Maybe it'll go away.

I roll my eyes and shake my head. Who am I kidding? First of all, that won't happen. Second, it won't be enough. Ever.

Jennifer's POV

„What are you doing babe?", Ben asks as he puts a cup of tea on my desk. I'm in my office, answering mails, but right now instagram distracted me. I quickly lock my screen.
„Nothing.", I smile at him and put my phone down. „Come here.", I say.