Prompt: "having second thoughts?"
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I'm stuck inside my head as I look at the dark night sky before me, my hands bracing against the metal railing in front of me. I hold onto it like I'll fall into an abyss of darkness if I don't.
My tense shoulders shiver in the slight breeze, the beautiful white wedding dress doing little against the cold.
It's not how I expected to find myself on the night of my wedding. It wasn't the groom that pushed me to isolate myself out in the balcony, listening to the music I picked while standing alone.
My family's word pushed me to wish I was anywhere but here. I wanted a small wedding, ideally just me, Fernando, and a priest. And yet my family took control again, demanding and demanding only to belittle everything I did. I heard the poorly hidden comments they made about my appearance, they way they were barley whispering about how I'd never be enough to make Fernando stay- not looking like this.
It hurt more than I let in because Fernando didn't question me when I said I needed to use the bathroom ten minutes ago.
I let out a shaky breath and look up to avoid letting the tears slide down my face. What a wedding huh? Crying and we haven't even had our first dance.
The muffled music grows louder before going quiet again. He doesn't have to say anything for me to know it's him.
He lets out a small sigh, "leaving me to the in-laws all by myself? Here I was thinking you loved me" he says in a teasing tone.
Despite my dampened mood a small smile peeks out across my face.
I look down at the floor under me before responding, "sorry I just needed some air" I breath out the words and try to sound find but I can feel Fernando move closer.
His warm hand comes up to my bare back, just above the expensive fabric of my wedding dress.
"Mi cariño," he coos, stepping closer to get a look at my stressed out face, "what's wrong?"
I sigh and open my mouth before closing it again. How can I tell him I'm not having a good time at the event we've both been thinking about since the day we met? I don't want to hurt his feelings and think it's because of him, when he's the only reason I'm still here.
"You're not having second thoughts are you?" The usual confident and calm Fernando I know is replaced with the worried and confused one I've only seen a few times in our relationship.
"No, no, God no" I quickly say, shaking my head rapidly to get the point across.
I finally look up to see him already looking at me. A frown pulls at his mouth when he catches sight of my glossed over eyes.
"Y/n what's wrong?" He ask again, his hand coming up to cup my cheek. His thumb runs over my cheekbone soothingly.
"Why did we invite so many people?" I try to joke and smile but it comes out wobbly.
His eyes soften and he steps closer to press a kiss to my forehead.
"Who do I need to un-invite?" He ask and I chuckle while leaning into the embrace he offers.
"Everyone?" I mumble against his suit jacket. He chuckles this time, holding me closer and pressing another kiss to my hair while almost mumbling, "I can do that if you want" into my hair.
I hug myself closer to him and feel my anxiety get smoothed over, Fernando becoming a warm balm to the stress squeezing my chest.
"We haven't even had our first dance yet and people are already talking about us" I grumble after moments of silence.
"Who cares what they are saying, this is our wedding- let us enjoy it cariño" he says softly.
"We should've just eloped" I joke and Fernando let's out a gently laugh that echos into my ear placed against his chest.
"I told you we shouldve" he jokes back as we finally pull away. I roll my eyes but still smile up at him.
We just look at each other for a moment or three, neither of us can look away as we're caught in each others eyes. I'm so happy I've found him. No one else could take my saddened mood and make it fresh and lively.
Fernando is the first to look away when a new song starts up, the live band changing from upbeat lyrics to a soothing instrumental melody.
He turns back to me with a soft smile, "what does my wife say to having our first dance as official husband and wife?" He questions and extends his hand towards me. My heart drums happily inside my chest as I slip my hand into his.
"I've been looking forward to dancing with my husband all night" I tell him as a blush climbs up my face. His smile widens and he pulls me closer, his free hand comes up to hold my waist as he brings our other to rest against his chest.
I lean my head against his shoulder as he rest his in the crook of my neck and collar bone.
Happiness and love fill my chest and make me feel like I'm on cloud nine. Fernando twirls me around before bringing me back, both of us smile widely as we slow dance to the muffled melody playing for us.
"Would it be rude to leave and not tell anyone?" He ask as we continue to away despite the song changing. I smile and move to look up at him, his eyes capture my gaze as a small smile spreads across my face.
"Who cares what they say, right?" I repeat his words from earlier and it makes him grin and nod.
He takes my hand in his again and soon enough we're slipping away from our own party.
———
El nando deserved one bc
he's the best example of my
cute lil daddy issues
(him and toto obvi)
