Mrs Jones (GxG)

1. {Morning After}

Our honeymoon cruise was scheduled to set sail in thirty-six hours. It was to be a one-week voyage across the Western Caribbean, visiting islands after islands and socialising with the locals. We were very excited about it. Our bags were packed, our bikinis and sunscreens ready. But, in the meantime, Drea and I wanted to spend as much time as possible with Alex, knowing that for a week, we wouldn't be seeing him. There was a lingering sense of anxiety that stirred within me whenever I thought about it. It's been two days short of five months since he was born. Every single one of those days, he's been in my presence, by my side. And before that, for nine months, he was a part of me. For one entire year, we had each other and if we ever were separated, it would be nothing longer than a couple of hours. So, now the thought of separation for even just a day terrified me. I would be missing him like crazy and I know Drea would no doubt miss him just as much as I would.

She puts on this strong, well-composed facade, but beneath that, just below the surface layer, I feel her anxiety bubbling. I see it in the ways she looks at him as if she's trying to preserve what it is like to hold him until she sees him again. As if just by looking at him for a second longer each time, the image of him would never fade out of her mind. She hides it well, her fear, but it isn't something she can hide from me any longer.

I shifted on top of her until I was facing Alex's empty bassinet. It was early in the morning. Early enough that it was still darker than it was lightened outside. The soothing chirps of birds in the far distance periodically disturbed the silence along with the soothing steady rhythm of her breathing. We were lying chest to chest. A position she and Alex would often be caught in. But just like Alex, it was my favourite position to just listen to her heart beating and being appreciative that she was alive. That she was mine. Her hands were glued to my naked rare beneath the duvet, groping it loosely even as she slept.

I frowned at the sight of the empty bassinet. I wanted to reach out and touch my baby's cotton soft skin. To caress his little cute face and whisper to him how much I loved him, but he was still with Amelia and Molly. They had taken him for the night so that we would have a little peace on our wedding night. The space was well needed and it was well enjoyed, but it was a little strange without him. A little strange to not have done bath time or his baby massage or watch Drea rock him to sleep while she sang him a melodic tune of Beautiful Boy.

We had gotten so used to him over the last five months that a night without him just felt like a part of us was missing. If a night feels like this, just a single night, what was the next week going to feel like?

Torture comes to mind, but I quickly shoved it aside to prevent the mounting anxiety from consuming me yet again. It was crazy how much our lives changed since his arrival. I was no longer just Julia and she was no longer just Adreanna. We were so much more now. We were a couple, a unit and we were parents.

The notion still feels surreal. It still felt like a dream sometimes. A concept that was unfathomable to my mind. Yet, no amount of waking up could erase or pull me out of it. It was a dream brought to reality. Despite the enchantment of it, it came with a lot of challenges. Challenges that we were still trying to navigate, but weren't given a road map to follow. Therefore, by default, we had no clue where to even go. Nevertheless, we were going, and from the moment we picked the baton of our relationship up, from the moment we both clearly stated that we were in this for the long haul, no matter what, we kept going and never looked back.

It was hard at times, yes. We stumbled a lot. We stubbed our toes and cried bloody murder and had painful emotional breakdowns, but we never stopped going. We helped each other up and kept going forward. On days when we couldn't run, we walked and even crawled. When my legs gave out and I swore I couldn't do it, she carried me until I could walk again. When she swore she couldn't do it, I did the same for her.