Her heart

45

Yesterday passed and I still feel awful. I'm still shocked and I'm trying to wake up from what feels like a nightmare. I'm alone in a house I barely recognise anymore.

I skipped school today and I told my mom I wasn't feeling well. She said she'll visit me later, but I'm not sure if I want her to honestly. I got tons of text messages from friends that I was too lazy to answer. I don't even know what to tell them. Billie also called me, but I blocked her number.

My head hurts like hell since I've been crying a lot. I barely slept and during the night I almost had a panic attack. I was all alone at home and the person who used to keep me company, was now scaring me. I was scared that she was gonna come for me.

The interaction we had yesterday was constantly replying in my head. She looked hurt. Maybe she actually loved me, but she didn't want to tell me the truth. I couldn't entirely believe her though. She felt like a stranger to me.

I heard the front door opening and I panicked, but then I remembered mom was supposed to come over. I tried to hide under the bed sheets and bury my face in the pillow.

When she entered the room she immediately drew the curtains and allowed the light to come in my room

"Ava, sweetheart, how are you feeling?" She asked as she sat on the edge of my bed. I kept my eyes closed, but she still noticed my puffy face.

"Ava? What's going on?" She reached out to check my temperature but I think I was maybe colder than usual.

"Ava" she whispered, caressing my back and trying to push me to the side. I decided to open my eyes and look at her. My vision was blurry, but I managed to see the hurt looked on her eyes.

"My angel, what happened?" She whispered and moved closer to me. I couldn't talk. My throat was sore and I didn't even know what to say.

"Come here baby" she leaned against the headboard and helped me lift my body. I leaned against her chest, hearing her heartbeat. She gave me a kiss on the top of my head and held me tight in her arms.

"Billie and I broke up" I finally said, feeling tears going down.

"What happened?" She asked, but I didn't answer. She knew not to insist, so she just sat there with me in silence. She was rubbing my back and giving me gentle kisses from time to time.

"Whatever happened, don't let it hurt you like that. You are strong, Ava. You are beautiful, smart and powerful. If she wasn't able to see that, then she didn't deserve you" I wanted to tell her everything so bad, but something was stopping me.

I knew that by telling her the truth, dad would also find out. That would have immediately affected her. I wanted her in prison, but something wasn't allowing me to do it yet. Something was telling me I had to wait.

"How is April?" I asked, trying to forget everything.

"She's...the same. We just keep waiting" my mom said with sadness. I knew how the situation was and I knew we didn't have much time left. It was awful.

"Don't worry about that. It will all be fine. Now, you need to wake up and freshen up. The world doesn't end here. I know it hurts, but you will get over it" she tried to cheer me up but it wasn't really working. I wasn't hurt just because of Billie. It was Noah too.

"I'll make some omelet while you change these clothes. Come on, lazy ass!" She screamed and that brought a smile on my face. Mom always found a way to make me feel better.

After eating, my mom left because she had to go back to April. I decided to text Victoria about what happened, but not the whole thing. All they need to know for now is that fact that Billie and I broke up.