conversations with the moon || minsung

7

"i don't want to be here." jisung groaned as he stood next to felix, who had a grip on his arm.

"yeah, you made that very clear." felix rolled his eyes as he rang the doorbell.

"you finally made it." minho smiled as he opened the door. "come on in, everyone else is already inside."

"hello jisung!" jinah smiled as the blue boy took his shoes off.

"hello." jisung politely bowed.

"we're gonna watch some movies, my moms are going on a date night." minho said as he led the two into the living room.

"we won't be back tonight. and probably not tomorrow either." heejin smiled.

"have fun." minho nodded.

"we will." jinah smirked. "we'll be leaving now. behave." she placed a kiss on the side of minhos head.

"we will." minho chuckled.

"you better." heejin smiled as she pressed a kiss onto the side of her sons head.

"bye moms." minho smiled.

"bye boys!" the two women called out as they left.

"you can sit down you know." minho chuckled as jisung stood awkwardly, felix already had made his way to changbins lap.

"uhm...where's the bathroom?" jisung asked quietly.

"i'll show you." minho began walking away, jisung following behind him.

jisung entered the bathroom, quickly shutting the door and locking it. he kneeled in front of the toilet, puking his guts up. he didn't know why he'd been so anxious. i mean, his best friends are there too, right? so what's the harm?

he hated the fact that he had to be there. felix had to fight with him and physically drag him out of the apartment to get him to come. and on top of that, he didn't take his meds today.

you're so fucking dramatic. get over yourself. you're so pathetic that you can't just suck it up and become friends with them? what a fucking baby.

you're really throwing up over hanging out with new people? god, get over yourself crybaby. when will you grow the fuck up and act like an adult? you're twenty years old already, yet you act like a child.

nobody would want to be your friend anyways, they're all here for your best friend. you just happen to be felix's best friend so you have to hang out with them. get the fuck over yourself.

"jisung?" minho knocked on the door. "are you okay?"

"yeah, 'm fine." jisung answered, throwing up once again.

you're a bad liar. he can definitely hear you, dumbass.

"i'll go get you some water." minho quickly walked away.

look at you, inconveniencing him. what a fucking crybaby.

"i have water for you when you're ready for it." minho called softly.

jisung spit a couple of times into the toilet, standing up and flushing it. he went to the sink, rinsing his mouth. he breathed heavily as tears fell from his red eyes.

he slowly turned towards the door, unlocking and opening it. minho entered, jisung sitting on the ground. minho sat down in front of him. he handed him the water, watching as he took slow sips.

"if you need to leave, that's perfectly okay." minho spoke so softly, jisung almost folded.

"it's fine hyung, i was just feeling anxious." jisung dismissed.

"i won't force you to be my friend. but take as much time as you need to be able to let me in. i'm still friends with yours and will be here when you're ready to become friends." minho kept his tone gentle.

"thank you hyung." jisung smiled softly.

"ji, are you okay?" felix peeked his head into the bathroom.

"i'm fine lix, i was just feeling a little anxious." jisung smiled softly.

"hyung i got him from here." felix entered the bathroom.

"okay, do you need me to get you anything else?" minho asked jisung.

"it's fine. can you just ask seungmin to get my toothbrush out of my bag?" jisung gave a half smile.

"yeah." minho nodded as he left.

"woah, you weren't cold to him." felix smiled.

"only because he was helping me. i know i should just let him in but i can't bring myself to." jisung sighed as he leaned his head back.

"i know. but i also do believe you will let him in eventually." felix nodded.

"yeah." jisung whispered.

"hey sung, you okay?" seungmin asked gently as he entered the bathroom.

"yeah, i'm fine." jisung nodded.

"here, brush your teeth." seungmin held out the toothbrush and toothpaste as felix helped jisung to stand up.

"okay, you guys can go. i'm not a baby, i can take care of myself." jisung gave a small smile.

"ji, there's nothing wrong with being taken care of." felix gently pat his head.

"i know, but we came here to hang out with your new friends. go have fun, i can take care of myself." jisung let out a sigh.

"okay ji. let us know if you need anything." seungmin gave a soft smile as he dragged felix out of the bathroom.

jisung locked the door, staring at himself in the mirror.

you always have to ruin everything. you're so fucking selfish.

jisung resisted the urge to punch the mirror in front of him. he rolled his eyes, deciding to brush his teeth so he can go back out there.

once he finished brushing his teeth he put his toothbrush and toothpaste back in his bag. he walked back into the living room, scanning for a place to sit. he decided on sitting between felix and jeongin.

"here, i got you some crackers." minho offered with a small smile.

jisung looked up into his eyes and once again, almost folded. he muttered a small "thank you." as he accepted the crackers.

"looks like you're warming up to him." jeongin whispered.

"mmm not yet." jisung shook his head.

"you say that all you want." jeongin rolled his eyes.

"oh, i will." jisung nodded.

"you are so stubborn!" jeongin groaned louder than he intended.

"give him a break and watch the movie." felix whispered.

a/n: just discovered i can work on updates while having no service so prepare for spam updates :))