conversations with the moon || minsung

26

"hey sung." felix walked into his room, sitting on his bed. "you doing okay?"

the boys had left not too long ago, jisung getting ready for the business dinner.

"yeah?" jisung chuckled as he turned around. "why wouldn't i be?"

"i don't know, just checking. i heard you arguing with minho hyung early this morning." felix kept his tone gentle.

"that was my fault." jisung sighed. "he wants me to cut contact with my dad and i got worked up and we argued. but we ended up crying in each others arms and then he made me hot chocolate and we talked things out. he's going to have his cousin investigate my dad."

"well, i'm glad you guys talked things out. i get where both of you are coming from. i also want you to have nothing to do with him but i understand it's not that easy. as much as we wish it was, it's just not. and i also know how you are." felix nodded gently.

jisung would never admit to himself that part of him was scared. he was scared to have his father punished because that was just his life. it was all he'd ever known. he was scared he'd miss him. it was going to be a big change and he wasn't ready for it, but he knew it was necessary. for him and his mom.

"thanks lix." jisung chuckled. "i'm really glad we talked about it. i don't ever want to push him away again." he whispered that last part.

"i understand that. and i don't mean to be pushy but are you sure your feelings aren't serious?" felix was cautious.

"i...yeah. i'm sure." jisung hesitated. "definitely not." he spoke as if he was trying to convince himself, and he was.

"okay." felix nodded. "i can tell you two really care about each other."

jisung hesitated to speak. "..yeah. i do really care about him. uhm...can i tell you something? that happened between us?"

"of course, you know you don't have to ask." felix had a soft smile on his face.

"so last night..he asked if i wanted to step out for a smoke. and then when i went to light my cigarette he took the lighter and lit it for me. and i don't know what came over me but i told him i wanted to shotgun with him. and he told me i don't need to hold back and i didn't.

"and THEN he told me to do it again and he told me he likes smoking better when it comes from me. and i can't stop thinking about it. the feeling of his hands on my waist and his lips on mine. it took all my strength not to move my lips and kiss him." jisung breathed out as he finished talking.

"well...were things awkward after?" felix asked.

"no." jisung shook his head. "i mean, other than us arguing because he doesn't want me to go to this dinner." he chuckled.

"i think you need to go alone. talk to the moon. honestly. say everything on your mind and don't filter yourself. be honest about everything you're feeling." felix spoke slowly, trying his best to not upset his best friend.

"you think i'm not being honest with myself.." jisung nodded.

"truthfully, ji, i don't." felix sighed. "but i understand why being honest with yourself is so scary in your situation."

"i'll go." jisung whispered. "talk to the moon."

"do NOT sleepover at his tonight. and do NOT bring him back here." felix spoke sternly.

"i will try but i won't promise anything." jisung shrugged as he stood up, straightening his suit.

"fine." felix sighed. "just talk to the moon ALONE sometime soon, okay?"