Always: A Hunger Games Fanfiction

Chapter 121

Katniss

The walk to Gale's is a blur. I don't remember much of it, besides stumbling my way through the dark, with the sound of Haymitch's heavy footsteps close behind me. I can't seem to focus on anything around me. No matter how hard I try, Peeta doesn't leave my mind. I get the eerily familar feeling of uncertainty. It's the same way I felt before seeing Peeta for the first time after his rescue. I know, though, that this ending will be different. 

At some point while I was thinking, we did reach Gale's small home that recides near the town square. Haymitch knocks obnoxiously loud on the door but I hiss at him to stop. I tell him that Gale's family could be asleep inside and I don't want to scare them. "You've gotten too soft," he says, rolling his eyes. I brush it off though, and pause for a few seconds to see if anyone would come to the door.

When no one does I say, "Go around back, there's a door. Make sure he doesn't try to leave." I cringe at my own words. I try and tell myself that there's no way Peeta would run from me. Not again. I give up and knock just as loudly on the door as Haymitch. "Gale, it's Katniss. Please open the door," I plead. I wait impatiently as another few minutes pass with no answer. I'm about to lose all hope when the door creaks open. There, stands Gale, dressed in a soft gray shirt and thick wool pants. 

"Hello," I croak, trying to hide any of the disappointment that I feel. I had been expecting Peeta to be the one who opened the door. The scene I had played out in my mind of Peeta and I being reunited slowly disappears as I stand awkwardly before my old hunting partner. He turns and I cautiously step through the door and into his home. 

Right when I take my first step, Haymitch comes in from the opposite side of the kitchen, his arm latched onto Peeta's. My heart seems to melt at the sight of him. "Good thinking, sweetheart. He did try to leave the back way." At his words, the relief and exhilaration I felt at the sight of Peeta vanishes, as if those feelings never even exsisted. Instead they are replaced with white hot anger and rage. I take two steps forward, never letting my eyes drop. I ignore the look of guilt plastered on his face. 

Before I let Peeta or myself say anything, I ask flatly, "Is your family here, Gale?" 

"No, they're with my mother," he says. He nods to Haymitch and they both tromp up the wooden stairs near the kitchen. 

I cut Peeta's words off right as he opens his mouth to say them. I muster up all the hatred I can and say, "You left me." I'm trying my hardest not to shout. I don't want to yell at him, but I can feel my temper rising, and I know I'm going to burst soon. "I could have died. The baby could have died. And you left us," I hiss. 

"I didn't-" 

"Do you have any idea of what you put me through?" I scream. I've lost it. I can't go back now. "I have had nightmares worse than I ever have before. So extremely horrible that they caused me to have panic attacks. And when I woke up I had no one. You weren't there for me!" I pause to take a breath because I know if I don't I will start crying. And I can't cry here. "You are a coward! You did something that you had no control over and you ran. You ran away. I know I never would have left you!" I'm yelling so loud now that I fear I will wake up the other houses next to this one. 

"You have no idea, Peeta! You have no idea what you did to me. You were just thinking of yourself and how afraid you were. You were being selfish!" I try my hardest to ignore the tears streaming uncontrollably down his face. I know that he has no words. I don't think I've ever yelled at him like this before. But I can't help it. My words won't stop. He takes a step forward to touch my arm but instead, on instict, I flinch away and back up. I wish I hadn't seen the look of pure pain on his face. 

"The Peeta I thought I knew never would have done what you did," I spit, using all of the leftover anger I can muster up. Now I feel deflated and speechless. I lower my eyes to the ground and allow one single tear to fall. "The nightmares I had; they were about you. I kept seeing you hanging from your neck in the woods. Or on a train, headed far away from here."

"I never would have-" he begins. 

"That isn't the point. The point is that I had no idea whatsoever to where you were. For all I knew, you were dead. You didn't tell me anything. And if Haymitch hadn't found me, I would have woken up alone and terrified. Did you ever think of that?" I say, my voice low and menacing. 

"I'm so sorry, Katniss," he whispers. Hot tears form in my eyes. I can't look at him anymore. Instead, I tell him to go home with Haymitch; that I'll be back in a few minutes. 

When I watch them leave, I wipe the exsisting tears from my cheeks and go upstairs to talk to Gale. "You really should let him talk you know," he says before I even get a chance to open my mouth. 

"Why should I do that after what he did to me?"

"Because you haven't heard his side of the story," he says. I scoff and roll my eyes. "Katniss, you didn't see him. He didn't come to me. I saw him outside, sitting alone in the rain. He was crying in the back alley behind The Hob. I couldn't just leave him there. And when I saw him I knew something had happened. My point is that he was horrified. If I was in his place, I don't think I could have lived with it either; learning that I may have killed my wife and my kid. I'm sorry I didn't call you earlier. I know I should have. But please, just give him a chance to explain," he finishes. I take a deep breath, wrap my arms around his back and rest my chin on his shoulder. Just like always, I have to stand on my toes to reach him. I whisper I hushed thank you and slowly trudge back down the stairs.

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For those of you who wanted a happy reunion, sorry :'D. But I promise happiness will come soon. Be patient. 

So sorry I haven't updated in forever, I've had rehearsal for a musical that I was in, but our performance was last night so I'm all done. Except I probably won't get around to updating until next weekend. 

Anyways, I hope you guys liked this chapter even though it was kind of anti/sad-everlark and (hopefully) filled with feels :P Be sure to vote and I'll update as soon as I can! Thanks for reading, I love you guys <3