Seventeen Imagines

Hansol

Imagine for anotherlostsxul

WARNING: This is actually kinda sad. Well, to me anyway.
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You walk into your empty apartment, sighing loudly. Your boyfriend, Hansol, was out working late again, trying to scrape up some extra cash.

You had both been struggling with money for months, struggling to pay the rent. You were happy enough, always cuddling by the fire in the evenings and cooking breakfast together, but in the back of your minds you knew it couldn't last forever. The money would run out and you'd both be homeless.

You let out a sigh again and crash onto the motheaten sofa, rubbing your forehead. You had just come back from a job interview and you were fairly sure you hadn't gotten the job. You had been trying for a while, to help Hansol with the rent but you were always turned down.

You get changed into something more comfortable and reread one of your favourite books. A few hours later, your hear Hansol's footsteps coming up the stairs and you smile immediately. He walks through the door and the smile falls off your face. You always forgot how exhausted he was these days.

"Hey there. You okay?" It was always the same greeting you gave him, to make sure he was alright.

He walks over, not saying anything, and takes you into his arms. He holds you close to him and buries his face in the crook of your neck.

"Missed you today." He mutters. You roll your eyes and stroke his hair at the back of his head.

"You say that every time you come home." You say, laughing.

"I miss you every day." He pulls back and leans his forehead against yours, smiling goofily.

"C'mon, don't be cheesy. Get changed and we'll play a card game or something."

"No, not tonight. I'm tired, let's just go to bed." He leans in a gives you a quick kiss.

He walks off to your bedroom, leaving you standing in the living room. You turn around and call out after him.

"Hey! Are you sure you're okay?"

"Hm? Yeah, I'm fine." He calls back.

A few minutes later you were in PJs and getting into bed. You curled up against his chest and he held you close to him. He kisses the top of your head and rests his face in your hair.

"Go to sleep. You're exhausted." You mumble to him.

"You sound so cute when you're sleepy."

"Goodnight Hansol."

"Nighty night."

You fall asleep smiling, completely content in his arms. But the feeling doesn't last as you wake up in the middle if the night to find that he's not there. Still half asleep, you streach your hand across the empty bed space.

"Hansol?" You mutter, sleepily.

There's no reply and you immediately wake up, worried. You get out of bed and wander around the apartment, looking. You walk past the bathroom but stop when you hear a sniffing noise coming from inside.

"Hansol?" You call again.

"Y/N! What are you doing awake?" He replies from inside. His voice sounds thick, like he's been crying...

"You weren't there when I woke up, are you alright?" You ask hurriedly.

"Uh, yeah I'm fine. Uh... I'll be out in a minute."

"Hansol. Let me in."

"I said, I'll be out in a min-"

"Now, Hansol."

There's silence and then he slowly opens the door. He's sitting in the edge of the bath his head in his hands, breathing heavily. A sob escapes him and he sniffs loudly, wiping his eyes.

"What's wrong? Hansol, what's wrong?" You stand in front of him, trying to lift his face up by he shakes his head.

"I'm- I'm sorry, Y/N." He says, his crying making it hard for him to speak.

"What happened? Please, don't cry."

He doesn't speak for a moment, and then he slowly stands up. He places his hands on your shoulders but continues to hide his face by looking at the floor.

"I lost my job." He says, his voice cracking.

"Is that all? Hansol, it'll be okay, don't worry." You try to wrap your arms around him but he holds you back, shaking his head again.

"Don't you get it? I'm not earning money, I- I can't provide for you anymore." He looks up so you could see his tearstained face. He reaches up and runs a hand through his hair, his body still shaking from crying. "I can't look after you, I can't do anything for you. I can't be that perfect boyfriend who can buy you fancy clothes and treat you to new jewelry. I can barely afford to pay rent for this crappy place!"

He wipes at his eyes but more tears replace them. You reach up and wipe the tears off his cheek. He places his hand over yours, looking at your face for your reaction.

"Hansol. Let me tell you something." You say quietly. He blinks a couple of times, his sobs finally subsiding. "I don't care-"

"No, no don't say that." He cuts you off, shaking his head again. He wraps his arms around you and whispers into your hair. "Listen to me. Please. You... You deserve better. You deserve someone who can give you everything and more. I- I want that for you. I want you to find someone who can do that for you. Because I can't."

His voice breaks and he buries his face in your neck, his breathing ragged. His broken sobs make your heart hurt and you stroke his hair. Eventually you decide that you need to talk some sense into him. You hold back your own tears as you force him off you and look him right in the eyes.

"You didn't let me finish. I. Am. Not. Going. To. Leave. You." You stress every word to make sure he's got it but all he does is shake his head again.

"Why? I've failed you, I-"

You cut him off by reaching up and pressing your mouth firmly against his. You start to kiss him and he resists at first but he eventually gives in. He places one hand on the small of your back, pulling you to him while the other strokes your cheek. You thread your fingers through his hair. After a while you pull back but keep your face close to his.

"Do you get it now? I love you and we'll get through this together. Can you promise me that at least?" You whipser to him.

"Y/N, I can't-"

"Can you promise me that Hansol?"

He slowly nods.

"Good. Now, let's go back to bed, I'm tired."

You both walk back to the bedroom and lie down together the same way you fell asleep. His eyes stay wide open while yours start to droop.

"Y/N? Do you really think it'll be all okay?" He whispers just as you were about to sleep.

"Yes. Now sleep."

"How can you think that?"

"I don't know. It's just a gut feeling. And I always go with my gut."

"You're weird."

"Thanks."

It took a while, nearly 2 weeks before you were both stable again. And when you eventually did get more money he always tried to spend it on you, buying you the things he always wanted to buy you. You wish he would but you didn't complain. He was laughing again and smiling that dorky smile. You were both happy again.
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I had no idea how to end this.

I am sorry.
~Lucy