The sweetest nightmares (Loki&Elsa and Jack&Elsa function novel)

Part 36 - The mission

Elsa :

After a few days of peace he asked me to tell me how Loki was like:
"Are you jealous of him? Don't be, I moved on from what he has done to me. "
-"No. I'm not jealous of him, being with you... you know... I - I just - " I smiled and almost laght.

-"It's okay."
I described Loki as clearly as I remembered and he nodded all along.

-"So that what it was all about. What did you want to tell me?"
He looked at me with hesitate and started talking:
"I saw a dream once and an image of his shadow burning in green flames was there.
You were in his filthy hands,I was so provoked , I would have punch him..."
His lips got as thin as a stright line while his clinched fists and his elbows got white until I touched his back and he relaxed.

-"Jack, you don't need to worry it was just a dream. I am here with you, and this guy is probably not around anymore."
I touched his hand to calm him down with a loving smile, and he smiled back at me when his hands got free and then said:

"I need to tell you something,
Before I got here I was trained to be a guardian and protect the world from the force of evil. My base was transported to the northern pole.
A war started.
Only this one wasn't regular. It was against the army called 'Chituri' army of aliens, where that solider came from.
They are leaded by an unknown recourse of power or a person. No one knew what made people disappeare and make green thunders but now you say it's Loki's type of power, getting this information with my dreams is very unlikely to be a simple dream. Are you sure he is dead?"

- " I ran away right after I got panicked and a frost wave spreaded everywhere."

He understood.
He got up and with his eyes running from side to side as fast as an arrow he thought for five seconds.
He didn't know how to put it right and turned around to face me over sudden:
"Elsa, there's a war ranging on out there."

He had desperation in his eyes and such crave like I never saw.
"I want to stay here so much ,Elsa. So much . I mustn't have it. I'm a guardian.
I want what we have between us to go on forever, I want to stay with you, to protect you. But I swore to protect the people.
If I wouldn't have drowned in that ice in the first place ,I would have never known you."He tried to conceal his emotions so hard.

He put his forehead on mine:
"I must leave now."

I tried to conceal my feelings for him too.
-"Jack? W-What do you mean? Y-You don't think you need to leave right now?"
He looked at me and I prayed him to say he's not leaving.

-"No." I felt relaxed, finally.
"I must stay here and protect the queen of Arandle. I mustn't leave. I can't leave." He looked at me with hope and excitement, but it hid something begging. Begging for a face of improving on my image.

"This is my duty." The hopeful smiled got off his face as he said this to himself to end up the debate.
He won't be able to stay.

I didn't let him , I didn't smile.
The world will tare itself apart only for us to exsist, in our love.
And we can't even confess. And now he is about to leave and bring me back to the lonlyness I was in.

He sighed after a while we were both silenced: " They need me to win this battle with them."

My eyebrows frowned as a preparation to see him getting out of my sight.
"Alright, I will stay for 5 days to protect you and leave you. At midnight. You won't feel a thing if it will make you feel uncomfortable."

I swallowed , relaxed and nodded.
-"Okay."
It wasn't okay.
I wanted him to stay to say he loves me. We could never do this.
I went away and saw he had a dot of hurted face when I looked back more exposed than him.
Suddenly, he grabbed my wrist and turned me back to him and though he did it gently and intensely , it hurted in.

He put his hands on my face and looked at my lips while biting his own really harshly.
It only make me feel things harder and crave for his touch too.

-'Until I finally started to love him he has 5 days to go? What will I do without him? Until I got an approval for love's existence?
Wait ...
He was never yours. He never admitted he loves you.
Now you only need to wait for him to leave. Hope for the best , and get back to your palace after the war.' I closed my eyes and looked down away from him.

*

One day,
There's only one day until he leaves at midnight and it's today.

There's a total chance he will go.
I don't have any illusions.
I will try smiling thought,
I will be happy because I want to enjoy of the moment he'll be here.
I prefer having this pain in my heart than to be selfish and not to allow him doing what he likes.

He took my hand when I came towards him and held it lovingly as it seemed to me and more welcoming than ever.
I never understood why he says he can't feel, he has as much emotions as everyone else has, they were only hidden.

I constantly saw a stressful sing in his face while we were working and enjoying of talking , but I decided not to mention the struggle I saw him having with himself , which contains much power and feels as it seems in his eyes.

We talked calmly and he told me jokes that made me laugh. He is so funny!
It always made my heart fly a little when we both laugh at jokes he makes. He makes them much better than I do, unless it was a clumsy moment.
It always makes him laugh as hard as he can.

Right now,
The way he looked at me while I laugh made me have that sparkle in my blue eyes , I felt the shine in my eyes back for one more time and it's wonderful.
I won't get low to spend my last night of love this way.
I will save every moment.

We had much fun all day and then he over sudden said:
-"Elsa, I have to confess."