The Kick Back

They always come back around

Today had to be one of the coolest days of the fall. A perfect seventy-eight degrees caused for me to dress accordingly. My body had to enjoy the cool fall breeze. The wounds from the fight with Maria were still fresh and a little air didn't hurt anything. A medium length Turquoise maxi dress, gold thong sandals with the rhinestones, gold accessories, and a fresh salt and pepper cut, complimented my style. It was a new a day for me. The fight still crossed my mind here and there. It was confusing trying to figure out Maria's purpose for starting a fight with me. She can bang but still she got her ass beat. If you knew you anything about me, I was a lover..not a fighter, but when the time I came I threw down. Fighting over a man was the last thing I would have fought over. The situation was deeper than Antonio. Maria simply didn't like me because I had Antonio's head gone. It wasn't intentionally at all, we just happen to fall for each other. Maybe had she been at the kick back, she would have had her opportunity. Though I was upset about the night before, nothing was going to ruin my day. My house was cleaned spotless, only thing left to do was head out.

Putting a few old pictures away I heard a knock at the door. Walking from the living room to the door "Who is it?", eye's did a double take. "It's Antonio." I hope he wasn't coming to start any drama over Maria. The fight was over and I didn't need any reminders. Opening the door I pushed Antonio back onto the porch. Closing the door behind me. "Whats up Antonio..what are you doing at my house?"

His eye's scanned my body. The fresh wounds were noticeable, his mouth dropped as he touched my face. "Stephanie, what the hell happened?" Pushing his hands away from my face I waved for him to have a seat on the steps. "It doesn't matter. Why are you here? Im confused." I confessed. Antonio was speechless as he examined the scratches on my face, arms, and chest. "Why are you scratched and bruised up?" Antonio didn't need an explanation as to what happened. No yelling, threats, or attitude could make me break my silence. "I think you need to go home." Antonio wasn't budging. "Look we need to talk. Please just hear me out." I sighed. "Alright Antonio make it quick. After you finish please go home and don't return back here."

"Stephanie don't act like that. Look im really so--", a slapped went across his face. "Fuck you and your apology. I have been going through hell about this break up. Not to mention fighting your bitch because she decided to run up. You act like you wanted nothing to do with me. So why the fuck are you at my door? for once I feel like life is coming back to me, and I don't need you coming around trying to fuck shit. My life is changing and things are coming around. Now if you are on some bullshit, take your selfish ass home."

Antonio looked as if I was looking a stranger. Rubbing his face he sat in shock. "Fighting my bitch? If you would not have started shit you probably wouldn't be bruised up, Stephanie." If looks could kill Antonio would be a dead soul. "You can't be serious Antonio. I didn't run up on her and I definitely didn't start the shit. She came at me and before you check me over Maria, learn to stop running your mouth. I shouldn't know that you told her you were my first, or that I had gone through an abortion. That was private Antonio and confided in you. I feel like I can't even trust you no more. I wouldn't be surprised if you slept with that crazy bitch."

"Why can't you look at me, huh? You slept with her? Really? you went as far as to sleep with this girl. That was supposed to be between us Antonio." Tears fell as the realization set in. Antonio was now sleeping with this girl. Even though we weren't together he wasn't supposed to sleep with her. "I haven't slept with anyone papa. Out of respect for you. Im crazy about you and whats mines is only to be shared with you. I guess I don't have the same respect."

My head shook as I stared Antonio down. "It doesn't matter anymore. We aren't together and from the looks of things it looks like you made it official with Maria. I won't block you or stop you, but I do want you to know whats going on with me." Antonio turned his attention to me. Making eye contact with him still made me melt. His beautiful green eyes always soothed me, no matter what we were going through.

"I wanted to let you know that after graduation I'll be moving. I've been making plans and applying to colleges in Michigan. They have a really good college that has a really good social work program. I leave the night after graduation. I'll be getting ready to put my parent's house on the market." Antonio's eyes began to water. His hands began shaking. I wasn't prepared for him to break down.

"What do you mean you are leaving? What about us?" shaking my head I wasn't about to play his games. He had become to distant and he had moved on. I didn't feel the need to stay. "There are better opportunities down there. The car market is booming and the jobs are endless. My aunt Shelia is helping me to get an apartment while I'm in school. I have already started college courses thanks to my advisers. I didn't want to leave without fixing things between us. We were friends before anything, well at least I was your friend. I don't know how you felt back then."

Tears fell and his voice began to scratch. "Stephanie you can't just up and leave like that. We have history together." Mentally I wasn't prepared for the man who was my knight to fall to pieces. He was supposed to stay strong, play it off, man up, anything but fall apart. "No Antonio..we had history and I still love you. I always will. I just know where your head is at. Anytime you could say those things that you said, you don't love me. Rape would not have stopped me from loving you. An abortion is hard I don't hold that against you, but anytime I made you feel nasty, disgusting, because I had an abortion we don't need to be together. Everything was a hard pill for me to swallow, and the man that I fell for couldn't understand that. I don't hold this against you but just understand why i'm leaving."

sobs began echoing from the porch. I would have never thought that Antonio cared. He had moved on with his life and I didn't want to stop him. I loved him but it was time for us to go our separate ways. So bad I wanted to hold him. Something kept stopping me...