Don't Go

Chapter Four

Someone was banging on the front door at two in the morning.  I groaned, getting up from the couch.  I don’t even remember falling asleep there.  I don’t even know where anyone was.  I strolled to the door, and opened it slowly to find a couple of policemen and Brian’s parent’s.  I gulped, “What’s wrong?” I asked, my insides shaking.  Brian’s mom broke down in tears, and his dad joined her.  “What’s going on?” I asked again, my bottom lip starting to quiver.  “We thought, y-you s-should be the f-first to k-know.” His dad stuttered.  The cops holding on to them, decided to speak up.  “Brian was in an accident.” My heart sank into the pit of my stomach.

                “Well, is he okay?  What happened?”

The cop sighed, getting ready.  “He was on his way home, when a drunk driver crashed into his side of the car.”  Now I remember why I was asleep on the couch.  I was waiting for Brian.

                “Is he at the hospital?  Where is he?  Is he okay?”

The cop shook his head, “He was killed on the spot.”

I felt light headed.  I felt like I was just punched in the stomach, knocking the breath out of me.  He can’t be gone.  No, he can’t leave me.  He can’t be gone.  I didn’t know if I was going to pass out, scream, or cry.  I can’t cry.  I don’t know why, but not a single tear has shed.  The cops and his parent’s became a blur in front of me.  I placed my hand on the door, slowly closing it.  I can’t do this.

                I stumbled into the living room, grabbing a hold of the back of the couch to keep from falling.  I missed, and fell straight to the ground.  I balled my hands into fists, and the tears started falling freely.  My best friend is gone, and he’s not coming back.  The more I repeated it, the more it became real.  There was an awful pain shooting through my chest, causing me to yell out—

“Jenna!  Wake up!”  Brian’s voice yelled, as he continued to shake me.  I quickly rose up, gasping for air.  The dream replayed in my head, and I quickly started sobbing.  Brian pulled me closer to him, and laid me back down on his chest.  “The nightmares are back.” I cried.  He stroked the back of my head, attempting to calm me down.  “I’m not going anywhere.” He whispered, kissing the top of my head.  I scooted closer to him, and his arms tightened around me.  He must think I’m pathetic.  My worst fear is losing him, and having no one.  I need Brian.  “Try and go back to sleep.” He whispered, rubbing circles on my back.  The rhythm of his heart beat made it easier to fall asleep.

Waking up an hour later, I found a sleeping Brian under me.  I glanced at the clock on my bedside table, and it was only five minutes past seven.  It feels later.  I think I’ve slept all day today.  The glory of being sick.  “Brian.” I whispered, trying to shake him awake.  He groaned, turning away from me.  I hovered over him, and moved closer to the side of his neck, “I will bite you if you don’t get up.”

                “Don’t you know I like it when a girl bites me?” he had a half smirk.

                “But I leave bruises.”

He squirmed for a few seconds before lying still again.  “I just want to sleep.” He whined like a child.  I placed my hands on his arms, giving him a few shakes.  “You’re not a loud to.  Now get up.  I’m bored, and you need to fix that.  I’m sick because of you, and you need to fix that too.”

                “If I was Jesus, you would be fixed.  But I’m not because you’re still sick.”

                “And bored.” I added.

He laughed, and slowly sat up.  “Nice hair.” I said, ruffling my fingers through it.  He smacked my hand away playfully, and tried to fix it.  I pointed to my bathroom, and he went in to fix it.  His eyes widened when he saw what I was talking about.  “Damn.  Talk about bed head.”  He was in the bathroom for a good ten minutes before he emerged looking like he did before he fell asleep.  As he walked back into the room, he grabbed his phone from his pocket.   “Oh shit, is that the time?”

I nodded, “Why?”

                “I’m supposed to be meeting the guys, and our manager.  He said he needed to speak with us tonight,” 

I gulped, because I didn’t like the sound of that.  “I don’t like that.” I mumbled.  Every time his manager needed to speak with them, means he has another tour lined up for them.

                He sat on my bed, and slipped his shoes on.  He grabbed his black leather jacket from my bed, and slipped it on quickly.  “I’ll call you when I get home.”  He gave me a quick hug, and disappeared out the door.  I walked over to my window, and watched him get in his car quickly.  He pulled out of my driveway, and sped down the street.  He worries me when he drives.  I collected myself, and walked downstairs.  I walked into the kitchen, where I found my mother cooking.  “I made potato soup for you.” She said, and got a bowl from the cabinet.  She filled the bowl, and passed it my way.  I gave her a weak smile and thanked her.  “Did Brian leave?” she asked, leaning over the counter.

I nodded, taking a bite of my soup.  “He had a meeting to get to.

                “You must be worried.”   She knew the whole cycle too.

                “Worried as I’ll ever be.”

She gave me a kiss on the cheek, before leaving me to finish the dishes.  I hate having the feeling that he’s going to leave one day, and forget me completely.  I don’t think I could deal with that.

                After finishing my soup, I stumbled back upstairs, feeling weaker than before.  I grabbed some clothes for a bath, and walked into the bathroom.  I turned the water on, letting the bathtub fill up.  I removed my clothes, and stepped in slowly to make sure it wasn’t too hot.  The warm water took the ache away from my body, letting me relax and close my eyes.  “Jenna!” I heard someone call, causing my eyes to fly open.  “I’m in the bathroom!” I yelled.  I heard my bedroom door open, and someone walk in.  My bathroom door was only cracked.  I heard the footsteps stop in front of the bathroom door.  “Hey, I need to talk to you.” He was back already?  He sounded almost out of breath.

                “Um, okay?  Let me get out.”  I stepped out, grabbing my towel from the rack.  I wrapped it around my bare body, and stepped out of the bathroom.  I found Brian pacing my bedroom floor, and he was mumbling something to himself.  “What’s wrong?”  I asked.  He finally noticed me, and he stopped.  I couldn’t tell if he was nervous, excited, or upset.  So many emotions played on his face. 

                He made his way to me slowly, “Promise, no matter what, you won’t be mad?”

I nodded, “I promise.  Now what’s going on?” I pushed again.

                “I’m leaving.” He said quickly.  My heart sank.

I felt the tears sting my eyes, “B-but you just got back.  You can’t leave again.”

He threw his hands in the air, “I know.  I’m so sorry.  I’m just going to Cali to film a music video.  I’ll only be gone two months.”  He took a step closer, gripping my face softly between his hands.

I shook my, “No.  You can’t go.  That’s two months too long.”

                “I want you to go with me.” He whispered.

                “You know I can’t, Brian.”

He lifted my head, forcing me to look at him.  “Yes, you can.  I’ll help you talk to your mom.”

                “It’s my dad you have to worry about.  And plus, I have school.  I can’t just leave.”

He dropped his hands, and looked defeated.  “I leave in a few days.  I hope I can spend as much time with you as possible.” He whispered and moved closer to me.  I didn’t think it would be this soon…