Chapter 23

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Chapter 23

"Are you fcking serious?"

"Yaah. Hindi nga din kami makapaniwala eh. And here's the catch, hindi lang sila basta nagdate, Andy actually treated her as if she's his real girfriend. Though hindi sila nag PDA or anything."

I just want to scream. Bakit ba? Ano ba kasi talaga ang kasalanan ko? Bakit hindi ako sumaya saya?

"Maybe you're just hallucinating or something? Come on, Sara! You can't be serious! Hindi pwedeng ma in-love si Andy kay Jamie.. He just can't.."

"Tigilan mo yung pag iyak. I won't tolerate you again, Dana. This is reality. It's either you have him or you lose him. And you chose to lose him."

I didn't..

I don't..

And i won't..

"Hi-hindi totoo yan! You know that i care about Andy! Ayokong mawala siya!"

"Yeah, you care about him pero mas may pakielam ka jan sa pride mo!"

"I didn't.."

"What? You didn't intend to lose him? Bullsht, Dana! Sa lahat ng nangyayari sa buhay mo, puro ibang tao ang sinisisi mo. For once, be responsible! You lost Andy dahil ginusto mo. Lahat na ng chance binigay ni Andy sa'yo para lang sabihin mo na mahal mo siya, pero anong ginawa mo? You just messed those chances. Ngayon, live with the consequences."

"But--"

"Sht naman, Dana! Hindi lang ikaw ang may karapatang sumaya, may karapatan ding sumaya si Andy. At kung si Jamie yun, wala kang magagawa, pinili mo yan eh. At hanggang hindi mo alam kung ano ba talaga ang gusto mo, tigilan mo si Andy. Maawa ka, nahihirapan din yung tao."

"May amnesia lang siya.. He'll come around, i know. He'll come around.."

"Sige lang, ireason-out mo lang ang pagiging duwag mo."

"Tangina lang, Sara! Nahihirapan ako! Spare me from all your words of wisdom!"

"Tangina mo din, Dana! I won't spare you cos' i care for you! Sisigawan kita hangga't magising ka sa kagaguhang ginagawa mo!"

"Ggo na kung ggo pero hindi ko talaga kaya. I want him all for myself!" Ako lang, walang kaagaw. Ganun ba talaga kahirap yun?

"Can't you get the whole point? Ganyan ka na ba katanga? You want him all for yourself? Then good kung yun lang, but the point is, hindi lang siya ang gusto mo! May iba ka pang gusto! Gusto mo pa din si Cyriel!"

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" I placed my hands on my ears. Ayokong marinig yung sinasabi niya.

"Ano? Iiyak ka na naman? Sige lang, iyak lang! Know what? Minsan iniisip ko na kaya napunta si Andy at Cyriel kay Jamie at Ynna kasi at least, alam nila Ynna at Jamie ang gusto nila. At least sila, isang lalaki lang ang gusto nila. Eh ikaw? Dalawa ang gusto mo. Sabi nga nila, you can't have the best of both worlds. Ngayon, ano? Wala na. Wala ka ng pipiliin. You ran out of choices. Don't hate me, sinasabi ko lang to dahil gusto kong gumising ka na."

"Just go. I want to be alone.."

"Mag isip ka, Dana. And i need to say something to you, ayaw ko sanang sabihin kasi si Andy dapat ang magsabi na'to pero sasabihin ko na, it's been five days since nakakaalala si Andy.."

"Ano?!"

"Yeah. Sige, alis na ko. Mag isip ka nga. Sinisira mo buhay mo."

Nakakaalala na si Andy? Five days ago? Si Jamie? Don't tell me..

Gusto na niya talaga si Jamie?

Oh God. Please don't let him fall for her.

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Andy's Point of View

"Andy? Andy?"

"Ha?" Kasama ko si Jamie ngayon sa caf, kumakain lang. "May sinasabi ka ba?"

"I've been talking for like forever. Hindi ka man lang nakikinig." 

"Sorry. Spaced out lang, ano nga ulit yung sinasabi mo?" Then i went near her and hugged her. Sabi niya kasi sa'kin pag naiinis daw siya, yakapin ko lang daw siya. I'm just doing what a good boyfriend does.

"Wala. Akala ko ba you'll try to love me? Bakit parang hindi ka naman nag eeffort? Ano, Andy? Aasa na lang ba ako?"

"I'm trying, alright? Hindi naman kasi ganun kabilis 'yun."

"I know, but---" Si Dana.. "What now? Pupuntahan mo na naman siya? Aklala ko ba gusto mo na siyang kalimutan?!"

Gusto ko, pero, "Just wait. Babalik ako." Then i stood up and went near Dana.

Pero nung lumingon ako, nakita kong umiiyak si Jamie kaya bumalik ako tapos niyakap ko siya, "Trust me, alright? Babalik ako." Then i kissed her forehead.

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Dana's Point of view

Dito ako ngayon sa caf, pupuntahan ko si Andy. I want to talk to him. Badly. I feel like i'll lose all my senses kung hindi ko pa din siya makakausap.

Pero i saw Andy hugging Jamie. That lucky btch. Ni minsan hindi ako nagawang yakapin ni Andy out of nowhere. 

Then papunta na dito si Andy tapos bigla siyang bumalik at niyakap si Jamie tapos he kissed her forehead. Hi-hindi niya ginawa sakin yun kahit minsan.. FU.

"Dana." He said, ni hindi siya ngumiti. It's like as if we're stranger to one another.

"Do you really love her?" Say no. Say no.

"What if i do love her? Ano naman sa'yo?" Then he looked straight into my eyes, "Do you love me, Andy?"

"Bakit mo ba iniiba yung usapan?! I'm asking you. If i do love her, ano naman sa'yo? Come on! Answer that damn question, Dana!"

"I- i don't know, alright? Naguguluhan ako, for God's sake!" 

He sighed, "Then that settles this. Sasagutin ko naman yung tanong mo, I still love you but I like her.. And i'm planning to love her." Then he left me.

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