I Love You, But I Lied - Mark Tuan and Got7 Fanfic

Part 48

Lei

When we got home from dinner with my parents, I immediately called my lawyer. I knew what I should do. 

When I got beside her on her bed, I really wanted to kiss her. I did. But, I know it's wrong. Yes, we're getting married and she agreed to it. Still, I have to know my limits. I have to earn her love again. I've been really selfish. I want to give back to her. 

So, the next morning, I decide to make her breakfast. Ok...I admit...I didn't really cook it on my own. I had the help of my chef. Omelet is not that hard...but I want it to taste good for her. I also brought her flowers. It wasn't that hard to get them. 

I also took her out for some shopping and just strolling around. I wanted her to be comfortable with me again. Just like the old days. I don't want to see the fear and pity I've seen in her eyes these past few days. I want her to love me again.

I know she still loves Mark. I can feel it. I even heard her say his name one night in her sleep. My heart aches, but it was my fault. I shouldn't have treated her that way. I regretted it since she broke up with me in high school. And I am regretting it more now. 

Today is the best day we've spent together, so far. Most especially when I finally announced to everybody that she's the woman I'm going to marry. 

What made me change my mind about the wedding date? Simple. When we get married, I want her to accept me as a real lover. I want her to love the idea of marrying me. When she would say she loves me back, that's the only time I'd marry her. For now, I just need to work hard to get to that point. Why? I love her, that's why. 

However, the perfect day - supposed to be - doesn't go undisturbed. My father had to call me just when we get home from the charity event. Way to destroy the night!

He says, he'd do anything and everything to stop her from marrying me or vise versa. Can't they just accept that I want her? Why do they have to dictate everything? 

What made me really angry was when he said he'd take her away if he had to and take back the company from me. Well... he can get his company back if that's what he wants. I just want Jess' company to be given back to her. 

I throw the phone across the lawn and start hitting the nearest thing I see - the brick wall. I try to let it all out before I get in. I don't want Jess to be seeing me  like this anymore. I don't want her to be scared of me or pity my condition. The pots of flowers along the front steps become shreds of broken clay and soil as I kick them off the stairs. I would've destroyed the doorknob if it weren't for the guard turning it to open the door for me. 

As I enter the house, Jess comes down the stairs, all worried. I hate that look in her eyes. I try to get away from her as much as I can but she's just being persistent. I don't want to hurt her anymore, you see. I try my fucking hardest to dismiss the urge boiling from deep inside me. I lock myself up in the bathroom just to restrain myself from touching her. 

The glass surrounding the shower crash down on the floor after I hit it repeatedly with my fists and feet. All the bottles on the counter roll on the floor. 

I hear Jess shouting and banging the door from the other side, but I muffle the sounds by putting my hands up against my ears. I sit on the cold tile floor and wait for the shouting to subside. It does...in an hour. 

I undress and dip my body in the tub, hoping that the water would cool me down. But, it doesn't. 

Instead, all the things that's been bothering me all this time resurface in my mind - father, the company, Jess, her dad's company, Jin-Ah, mother, drugs, women.