I like to complain, a lot. So much, in fact, that if I got a euro for every time I ranted about something, I'd have enough money to go on a cruise, at least twice a year. Salty is my middle name, so if your food is ever lacking that sodium chloride...
Haven't ranted for three days, so in honour of my return, I've decided to do...
.
.
.
A DOUBLE RANT!
WHAT????? WHAT????? SAY WHAT???? *woman screams in the background* *fireworks go off* *babies cry*
Yeah, that's right. A double rant.
It's like a large serving of fries topped with a healthy amount of salt and a thick, mushy layer of ketchup.
Yum.
So today's rant is brought to you by HappilySinister, a salty reader who I've infected with my bitter, gangrenous hatred for humans:
"Hey, just a suggestion for a rant haha
You could do one about people who interrupt you constantly. I don't know about you but these people PISS ME OFF. Like there is one girl in my class who won't even let the TEACHER finish what she's saying.. Seriously what compels people to think that what they are saying just so desperately needs to be said at that exact second ?! They couldn't wait 5 teeny tiny more moments to say whatever they were going to say ??? AHHH hahaha
Same goes to smokers who start lighting up TWO FEET away from the school gate. They couldn't wait for TWO FEET? Noooo they just want me to inhale all their excess smoke -.-"
~HappilySinister~
*takes a deep breath*
Do y'all smell that? It's the smell of a double rant.
Right now, I kind of feel like Aunty May, you know the one you always write to in magazines for advice. Except that instead of giving you advice, I take your suggestion and amplify it with my saltiness.
Back to the point: people who interrupt you and smokers.
Let's get started, shall we?
-:-
People who interrupt you.
There's the perfect emoji to describe how I feel about them: 😤
These people always seem to have something to say right when you're saying something, and it's annoying as fuck.
They also tend to do this with the quiet ones—those who don't speak unless they have something to contribute to the conversation.
*Alphabet people chatting*
Person A: *hasn't spoken a word in two hours* Yeah, I think that's great as—
Person B: WELL YUPPY-DIDDLY-DO, I GUESS IT'S TIME FOR ME TO TALK NOW, EVEN THOUGH I'VE BEEN PRACTICALLY MONOPOLISING THE CONVERSATION SO THAT IT REVOLVES SOLELY ABOUT ME—HOW DO I EVEN HAVE FRIENDS WITH THIS SHITTY ATTITUDE, I WONDER.
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And yeah, this applies also to people who disrupt a class to talk shit as well, especially if it's one of those classes where the teacher is DA BOMB. Good teachers are a rare gem nowadays, and if you have to interrupt a lesson with your stupidity, just take your ass out. The door is at the front of the room.
There's a Native American proverb that could help people like this greatly:
"Listen or your tongue will keep you deaf."
-:-
Now for the smokers.
I personally think that smoking itself is a disgusting habit. Like picking your nose.
I got nothing against smokers, but if you're gonna light up, do it 532423 feet away from me.
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Nobody in my family smokes, but I have relatives, namely uncles, that do, and one of the worst things in existence is when they decide to start smoking in the room like....stop? Did you know second-hand smoking is even worse than smoking itself because you're practically inhaling all the garbage from the cigarette? I know you like being self-destructive like that, but I rather avoid getting one of twenty types of cancers linked to smoking. Ty.
Like, don't even get me started on all the health issues that come with smoking...on every cigarette packet you get pictures of charcoal lungs and rotting mouths, yet people STILL light up.
If graphic images of charcoal lungs and rotting mouths aren't enough to deviate you from smoking, then at least the price tag should? I know in Australia they tax cigarettes heavily to prevent people from buying them—it works.
But then you have peer pressure, the need to conform to what people consider 'cool', the fact that nicotine is addictive/a stress-relief, a family background of smokers...
ANYWHORE, that's not the point of this rant.
My point is, I hate pampering myself with fruity shampoos/conditioners, actually giving a fuck about what I wear, stepping out onto the street then have some random asshole blow that disgusting smoke in my direction. It clings onto you like a bad decision you made back in 2005 and doesn't let you go until you're sobbing your sorrows away in the corner of your running shower.
I know some people even get nauseous from the smoke, but really it's just a matter of being considerate of other people. There are smoking zones and non-smoking zones and I'm surprised more people aren't getting fined for pulling out those cancer sticks where they shouldn't.
Seriously, think of the children.
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-:-
Aight I'm starting to get less story-tellingy and more ranty, but I guess that's the point of this book right?
Special mention (for the nth time) to one of my salty readers HappilySinister for suggesting that I rant about these things. I hope I made your day just a tad more unbearable.
Fuck yeah, the GIFs got uploaded!
🍟🍟🍟
Is there something that you're itching to complain about, but have the good sense not to do so on a public forum? I can do it for you! Feel free to PM me with the topic you want me to rant about, and I won't think twice before adding it here. I'll be waiting!
