DEATH BATTLE

Episode 10: Regret vs Sora

(A/N: This is one of the fights I've been raring to write, so I decided to write it as gloriously as possible.)

Zenonia vs. Kingdom Hearts! Two children of the light enter the battlefield, but among the Holy Knight and the Keybearer, who will leave alive?

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Wiz: That was...slightly less satisfying than I'd expected.

Boomstick: *pained moan*

Wiz: Well, I still feel kind of empty. It's highly unlikely I'll get any more dates at all...

Boomstick: *moan* That's 'cause of that GIANT MECHANICAL ARM YOU'VE GOT. I mean, come on! Let's just get on with the show.

Wiz: *long pause* *groan* Fine. ...When the world is plunged into danger, sometimes you can't expect a knight in shining armor to come to its rescue. But rather, a child with a pure heart...and a ridiculous hairstyle and weapon...may always swoop in to save the day.

Boomstick: Like Regret, the wandering Holy Knight!

Wiz: And Sora, the Keyblade-wielding protector of hearts. Since both combatants use wide, player-customizable arsenals, they will be bringing along their most iconic and/or powerful weapons and abilities. As for Regret, his Warrior class in Zenonia 1 will be used, and we'll assume all of his active and passive abilities are maxed out.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win...a Death Battle.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

REGRET

Wiz: In the war-ravaged land of Zenonia, a child was born and left in the middle of the battlefield. His destiny would be intertwined with the world's, for as the seed of all chaos, he would either save the world or plunge it to ruin.

Boomstick: Uuuntil a member of the Armed Salvation Army picked Baby Potential World-Wrecker and raised him as his own. Way to go, Wilfred or Pardon or something.

Wiz: The child was picked up by Commander Dupre of the Holy Knights, who retired from his service to raise said child, who he eventually named Regret.

Boomstick: Things were looking up for father and son, aaaand then some demon landed from the sky and murdered the sh*t out of Pardon--

Wiz: DUPRE, Boomstick! His name is DUPRE!

Boomstick: The townspeople called him PARDON!

Wiz: But his character card calls him DUPRE!

Boomstick: Well, I call YOU Commander SH*THEAD!

*Intermission*

Boomstick: Well, people, I realize I was wrong, and I take full responsibility for it. I played the opening and found out that Regret's father is, in fact, actually named Commander Dupre. I also concede that my co-host Wizard is correct. *strained laugh*

Wiz: *lowers mechanical arm, still smirking* Good. *clears throat* Left an orphan to fend for himself, Regret was shunned by his neighbors, while the others were just plain annoyed at his presence.

Boomstick: And then some dude named Billy ordered him to take a hike to the town of Adonis. Buuut Billy was actually a spy for the Dragon Clan and was selling out secrets to the Evil Bruce Lees.

Wiz: Upon his arrival, Regret ran into a girl named Sun, who would later become part of his destiny...

Boomstick: Awww, they look so cute together!