Body Language. Queen

Brian The Lion.

Freddie's P.O.V.

Charlie? Brian? Brian? Charlie?
Fuck.

What was I doing? I'd only just met Charlie. I didn't even fancy him that much. He was cute. But far too innocent. And he was smaller than me. His mousey brown hair and his green eyes were quite attractive but they had nothing on the dark brunette curls and hazel eyes of Brian's...

I didn't know Charlie. I knew Brian. Perhaps too well...

Charlie knew who I was and was acting like a fan coming to meet me, surely he'd snap out of that but him gawking at me all the time could become annoying...or I may like it. I'm so unpredictable I don't even know myself.

I wanted Brian but God knows why. He was nothing but an arse to me even when I tried to be nice. He was so bitter.

Bri was tall, dark, incredibly handsome. Sexy, even. He was intelligent and challenging and that was a turn on for me. He carried himself well, he had his classy side and his down to earth side. He was funny, awkward, talented, cute and confident all at the same time. He was everything to me. The full package. Everything that I ever wanted out of a partner...

Charlie was nothing to me. I'd known him for ten minutes, I was his bloody landlord for crying out loud.
So why couldn't I stop thinking about him?

Maybe because of the fact I was pretty sure he was gay. And the point that I'd be getting to know him more as time went on...was exciting? The prospect of maybe hooking up with him? If he liked me, of course.

Was I being a total bitch? That I thought Charlie was maybe an easy target? To get laid for the first time in forever? To have a pretty little boyfriend just because I wanted one? Not because I loved and adored him...

But which was screaming louder?
My heart? That wrenched every time I saw Brian because there was already love present in my beating heart for him, the one who I did love and I did adore...

Or my cock? The one that most of the time screamed louder than the heart, the one that wanted all the attention and the one I'd been trying to ignore for these past 5 weeks or so...the one that saw Charlie and thought 'easy fuck'.

Or maybe it was because Charlie had been nice to me in a way that Brian hadn't. He'd smiled at me, made conversation with me, looked at me as though he was interested.

All the things that I yearned Brian to do but he doesn't.

We didn't talk, we argued.
He didn't smile at me, he glared at me.
He wasn't interested. He ignored me.

How much more could I try? Maybe I would hook up with Charlie for my sake. To get a little happiness back...to feel less alone. Get back at Brian, after all he thinks I fuck everybody and then never talk to them again. Maybe I could lay my smooth side on Charlie, get him under my wing, look after him a little, take him out, hook up...fuck? But I wouldn't just 'wave goodbye' like Brian says I do. I'd stay, just to prove to him that I can stay with one person for longer than a month. Who knows, me being with someone else and taking my mind off Brian might make me move on from him. Being with someone might even make Bri jealous.

I laughed to myself in the street at that last thought. What a fucking dreamer you are, Freddie. Brian would never get jealous.

What the hell was I doing anyway?
Thinking like this. Expecting Charlie to just fall down at my knees and hook up with me right away. I was so vain and expectant sometimes.

I was on my way to meet the guitarist at the Stone and Feather in town.

When I got back to the house earlier after meeting Charlie, Bri had already left for work...after an argument with Roger...he wouldn't tell me what they argued about, but I knew it had upset Roger as he hardly came out of his room all day and didn't even come out when Deaky went to try and get him to eat dinner with us.