moments ♡

stenchy ♡

Since they'd been married, takeout had become a more rare occurrence. He liked cooking for her, and she was more than happy to watch him cook and eat his delicious creations.

Sometimes, though… There was this intense craving for some Thai food that he couldn't quite recreate, so they'd get all dressed up and go to the Thai restaurant a few miles from home. Sure, her dress and his button-down were maybe a little too nice for this place, but no one seemed to mind.

He always had something wildly adventurous while she nibbled on the same dish she had every time they came to this restaurant. He had stopped trying to convince her to try new foods long ago. It normally ended with her crying and almost a whole plate of food going into a to-go container for him to have later.

They had flirted shamelessly at the dinner table. He kept his legs pressed against hers, and the muscles of his thighs and tightness of his jeans kept her mind on getting him home and not the conflicting noises and smells around her.

Still, she was more than ready when their bill came, it was paid, and they were going home. She loved being out with her man - getting to show off how handsome he was and all - but she loved being wrapped up in a million blankets on the couch with him even more.

Her hand was in his as they sang together on the way home, and when he parked in their front yard, he took his chance to lean across and kiss his girl. Her hands found his face, and she happily kissed him back, so utterly in love that she hardly believed this was real.

Within a few minutes, they were one with the couch, her clad in his t-shirt and him in pajama pants, wrapped in blankets and watching Food Network. She stole glances at him, and he stole kisses from her lips and her cheeks and her forehead and neck and shoulders.

He was so consumed with how much he loved and wanted her. He adored her so endlessly.

What he did not adore was… that stench.

"Do you smell that babe?" His nose crinkled adorably as his hand moved from her waist to his face.

She giggled. "Nope. What does it smell like?"

He coughed. "Hellfire and brimstone."

Her giggle turned into a belly laugh, and he coughed again.

"What is this?" he demanded, standing and making his way across the room.

"Guilty," she laughed, raising her hand.

His hand flew from his face to his hip. "Did you really just fart on me?"

"It's not all my fault!" She couldn't rein in her laughter. "You're the one who wanted Thai food! And your food looked so good!"

Her laughter had proven to be contagious, but the room still reeked. He called her by her full name as things got louder and smellier. "I'm never feeding you Thai food again."

"I'm so sorry, Babe!" She actually did feel a little bit bad, but she couldn't regain any sense of composure. "I didn't think it would smell so bad!"

He rolled his eyes. "You mean your toots don't stink?"

"Not every toot stinks!" He was a mess of giggles now, too, doubled over with a bright red face and trying to get it together before failing miserably. She stood, and the horrendous odor followed her as she joined him on the floor.

"You're so smelly," he squeaked, trying to grab a breath in the middle of his laughter.

She touched his face, which was stretched into the prettiest smile she had ever seen. "But you love me."

"I'm silly over you." He was suddenly serious, and they laid on the floor together as the smell died down. "You are my every breath."

She chuckled, but he was serious, even through his laughter.

"Even when things stink, you're my everything." They were literally rolling in the floor with laughter, so in love and amused that they could barely think straight.

It occurred to her to roll her eyes at how very cheesy this all was, but she was too enamored with him. "And you are my life."

"Even when life stinks?" Then, the room doubled in stench, and he was guilty.

It amazed her vaguely that they could laugh at bodily functions like middle schoolers but within the same relationship, they could pay a mortgage, shop on a budget, and make phone calls like adults.

How refreshing it is to be loved for every part of your being -

Even the smelliest farts - er - parts.

Author's Note:
I am a middle school boy.

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