Lost In Stereo {Sequel To LINLYAA}

Chapter Fourty Six-When Did You Start Growing Up

"Therapy is every kids nightmare. When everyone is telling you you need help and all you really want is a hug." - Alex Gaskarth

T E L L I E

New text from: Zach❤

How was I supposed to no? I thought you would've told him

New text to: Zach❤

You shouldn't have said anything. It wasn't your business and you didn't need to have a discussion about it! So fuck off and leave me alone

New text from: Zach❤

Fuck you Tomlinson! Go jump off a cliff or something see if I care.

New text to: Zach❤

Ladies first.

New text from: Zach❤

Bitch I go first.

New text to: Zach❤

That's what I said

New text from: Zach❤

Your a bitch.

New text to: Zach❤

Just fuck off and leave me alone... don't talk to me. ever.

I dropped my phone to the ground, choking on tears. He told me to kill myself. The only reason I could think of not to jump out a window the other night was Zach, and just then he had told me to kill myself.

Ouch.

I laid sprawled across the bed, crying harder with every second. Was there a point in living?

"Hey Tellie,"

I sat up as Eleanor walked into the room, looking at me sympathetically while shaking her head.

She sighed. "You okay sweetie?"

"Does it look like it?" I snapped bringing a tissue to my eye.

"We all go through bad break up's Teej."

"I don't care that we broke up."

"Then what is it?"

I let out a shaky breath, thinking of the text messages. He wants me to die. He wants me to kill myself. If you've ever heard that someone say you should be dead, then you understand the confusion. It feels strange. At first you want to punch them and walk away as they yelp, and then you start to wonder what if they're right.

"Whatever it is," Eleanor continued. "It'll get better."

I nodded, even though I didn't believe her, I nodded.

"Are you gonna come downstairs and eat?" El asked, still looking at me sympathetically.

"I'm not hungry." I said bluntly.

"Okay, just come down when you are."

I watched as she left, closing the door behind her. I wanted to scream out my lungs. I wanted to cry. I wanted to text Zach some amazing, cocky, bitchy remark that would forever stay in his head. Exactly what he had done to me.

I would never be able to look him the eye again, without remembering him telling me to kill myself. But maybe I would kill myself. Then he'd forever live with the guilt. 'Cause I'd make sure-boy would I make sure that everyone knew it was because of him.

Go jump of a cliff or something

Itwasthe first thing I thought of when I woke up. Zach texting me that. Sweet Zach who had given me his jumper one day 'cause it was cold. Zach who'd said me becoming his girlfriend was the best part of his summer. Zach who'd taken me to party, by watching me jump out my bedroom window. Zach who asked me to help him with his Romeo and Juliet essay and found me replying with "Read the play." stupid. Zach who kissed me out the front of my house at midnight. Zach who kissed me just 'cause he enjoyed it. Zach who sat with me on the driveway listening as I cried about depression. Zach who lied to me. Zach who said he'd never tell anyone my secret. Zach who told my secret. Zach who told me to kill myself. My Zach.

My heart was his. Even if he told me to jump off a cliff. It was hard to replace everything else he'd ever said. Maybe he could be my Romeo. But maybe I wasn't his Juliet.

"Tells you awake baby girl?" Dad asked softly, snapping me from my thoughts. I didn't feel like talking, so I just laid there in bed not making a sound.

Dad sighed. "Tellie don't pretend to be asleep. You can't do it love."

"I am asleep." I replied opening my eyes but still laying in bed holding my blanket tightly around me. Dad shook his head.

"Nice try." He chuckled. "You okay?"

"Yeah." I lied as he sat on the end of the bed.

"Tells... I think you should know something..."

"What?"

"Honey, what happens when your thirteen doesn't matter. It may seem like it now, but really love by next year it's not gonna matter to you. So don't go doing anything...stupid..."

"You read my texts." I said dully.

"Sweetie, you left your phone on the ground and you had a whole lot of texts from that boy. I didn't go in your phone and read them, I read one that he sent this morning." Dad replied.

"He texted me?" I asked, sitting up my eyes wide.

"Yeah. I can't remember what he said exactly but there was something about him telling you to kill yourself..."

I gulped.

"Love don't listen to the jackass." Dad murmured. "And don't take him seriously baby girl..."

"I don't take him seriously." I lied.

"Don't lie to me darlin'... Just... He's just trying to get you with a way he knows will work. So don't. Don't ever, take shit like that seriously. Don't ever do shit like that."

I nodded.

"Come have breakfast Teej." Dad muttered getting up from the bed. "It's almost eleven."

"I'm not hungry..."

"I don't care. You didn't eat last night so you're eating now. I'm not going through this whole thing again."

"Okay... Can I use the TV in the lounge room?"

"Why?"

"I wanna watch sad, depressing movies without happy endings."

"Tells, the whole reason your aloud to stay home is 'cause we don't want you to be sad and depressed. Don't ya think maybe happy movies would be better?"

"There's no such thing." I say twisting my necklace around my finger.

Dad scoffed. "Oh really?"

"Nobody would watch, a "happy" movie. Even the movies and books with happy endings have something tragic happen. 'Cause that's what people want. They want to see tragic things happen to good people and then see them have a happy ending. So when things get bad for them they'll have hope for something good to come. But I don't want hope. So I'll watch sad movies."

"Tellie-"

"It's the same with books." I cut in. "Nobody wants to read about someone living a perfect life. People want to read about the character struggling to fit in. They want reassurance."

Dad slightly smiled shaking his head as I got to my feet, following him out of the room.

"What?" I asked, looking up at dad who was still smiling.

He shook his head. "When did you start growing up?"

(A/N

SORRY IT'S SHORT EVERY TIME I SAT DOWN TO WRITE MY MUM WOULD ASK ME TO DO SOMETHING SO I DECIDED JUST TO POST THIS FOR YOU GUYS :)

SO ZACH... YEAH ZACH... ZACH ZACH ZACH. ZACH IS A DOUCHE.

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