This is a farewell

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Everything become slow motion. Doctor and nurses come to the room. All the voices feel like coming from under the water.

(b/f/n)'s mom cry her eyes out and hug her husband. That moment I know I'm gonna lost her, my best friend. I look at them before walk away. Slowly I walk until I'm in front of my mom's room. If this is what the zombie felt when they walk slowly and hopeless than I feel sorry for them.

~Time skip~

It been awhile and I feel like it already midnight since the moon is high and lighting this room.

(b/f/n)'s mom came with a puffy red eyes not long ago told me that she will make a ceremony for her daughter. It a great pain when I looked at her. I feel it. I feel how I'm lost someone important in my life.

The person that always make me go crazy about her kpop idol which is now my turn to be crazy over. Every time I thought about that it will make me smile and want to cry at the same time.

I feel empty and lonely, it makes me can't sleep either.

I sigh before slowly up from my seat and out of the room to get some water. While I'm waiting the machine give me my damn water the doctor and nurses start running and talk at each other in a fast speed. Just looking at the doctor make me feel uneasy.

Forget the water I run along with the doctor and nurses. As soon as they rush to the room. I gasped for air. When I'm look at the number of room, automatically I'm fall. The room where my mother in.

I don't know how long has it been and I'm still on the floor and the doctor finally come out.

When He saw me on the floor with an empty eyes. He kneel down until reach my eyes.

"Are you her daughter? "

He asks softly. I look over him. He looks like a middle old man or it because he thinks too much make him look old? He need fairy-god-mother to take care of his look. Or am I wrong? Wait what am I saying?

Suddenly I feel someone hand on my shoulder make me snap from my thought. I look back at the doctor and he gives me his sweet smile. Or is it?

~Time skip~

Everyone wore all black right now. Almost all of them crying and some of them are chatting and some of them just comfort each other and I don't know.

I'm still stare at the window not knowing what to do or what exactly I'm looking at. When Suddenly I feel someone tapped my shoulder.

I look over it and found (b/f/n)'s mom look at me with her small smile and her red eyes.

~Time skip~

"Do you want to said anything honey?"

Said (b/f/n)'s mom. I feel like someone stabs me at my heart when I heard that words. I sigh and nod before come in front.

I take a deep breath before open my mouth.

"(B/f/n) is really a good friend. She's a part of my family. She always takes care of me and be there for me when she know I'm alone like a real sister that I've never had. "

As I said that my voice start to crack. The memories of her come in my mind. I take deep breath before look at my mom pale face. She look's like an angle.

"Mom."

I said a little slow before continue.

"She's the best mother ever. She's like a super hero for me not heroine but a hero who always support me. I knew it even she didn't say it that she love me more than anything. I'm sorry mom because all this time I've been rude, I've been ignorant. Now I know how it feel, the feel of regret.... Mom... I...."

I can't finish my words. The tears that come out, all the words stuck and didn't want to come out. (B/f/n)'s mom come and comfort me before help me walk away.

~Time skip~

It been three weeks after the ceremony. Yet there is no news from the boys. They didn't come over and asks is everything okay.

All the news I've got only from the media social. They are doing great. No more burden for them to take care of or someone who is always drag them down. They become popular each time.

I should be happy right? They are doing well. But why I didn't feel it? The emotion of happiness.

(B/f/n)'s parents move out from Korea. They ask me to go along with them. I want but I can't. I've to stay with my auntie and her family. They are fine. They treat me well I want to show my thankful but I can't... I just can't.

The sound of my booths walk trough the snow like a music for me, the coldness from the snow feel like I'm finally home.

I fix my coat to keep me warm before keep walking without any destination. I go to anywhere my feet brought me. I didn't look where I went when suddenly I heard a loud horn that make me stop. I am so close from the road and thanks for that car I'm still alive. I sigh and look up to the sky and let the snow hit my face. The feel of coldness hit my face make me feel good.

"I hope you guys make it. You guys will be number one in the world and most important you guys will be always happy with each other."

I take a deep breath before smile and said it.

"This is a farewell from me."

~The end ~

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