What was Lost and Found in the Fire

Ch. 1 Stepping Out of Grief

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Luke's POV

Location: Luke and Gabriel's Apartment in NY City

Date: Three years after The Kidnappings

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I'll don't think I'll ever understand why people enjoy drinking straight alcohol.

I take a swig of the golden liquid in my glass and let out a grunt of dissatisfaction as the alcohol burns all the way down my throat. I don't find it pleasant in the slightest.

Seeing as we only have scotch in the house, it'll have to do.

Sprinkles the skunk, my faithful companion and lap-warmer extraordinaire, takes a sniff at the glass and sneezes like the cute bastard he is.

He isn't happy with it either.

He's so big now, big enough in fact that he's covering my entire lap and can still rest his big, fat head on my stomach. It makes me wonder how he would look, laid out on his other owner. Would he completely cover her legs and torso if she was laid out like I am on my couch?

Would she giggle at his cute little snuffles when he eats?

Would her eyes soften up at the way his ears slope down his head as he slowly falls asleep?

Tears build up in my eyes, prickling them and I let out another sigh.

You'd think 3 years would at least be enough time to think her name without tearing up. I shouldn't be drinking.

I take a second to clear my head and calm down. The anniversary of her disappearance is coming up, and I've found that I think of her more during the days leading up to it than I do for most of the year.

I used to think of Sang with every breath I took, but now it's the little things that bring up her memory....

The scent of warm cheese and apple or zesty, meat-filled soup takes me back to watching her in the kitchen.

The sight of pristine, untouched snow, blanketing a field fills me with thoughts of her and the guys throwing snowballs and messing around.

Hair clips in golden hair.

Bean bag chairs.

Gummy Vitamins.

I groan. God, what's wrong with me. I've got to stop doing this to myself.

It doesn't help that if my conversation goes well with Gabriel, we'll have yet another person staying with us that brings back memories of all we lost, when we lost Sang.

I rough up my hair when her name floats into my mind. It hurts too much to think of her on purpose. It's like asking for a black eye.

I focus instead on thinking about what I need to get done tomorrow. Should I bake some cupcakes for the bakery to drop off before I head to the jailhouse?

I shake my head. No, I'll just eat them with the mood I'm in. Stress eating won't help any better than the scotch did.

Do we need groceries?

I shake my head again. No, I just went yesterday.

I wrack my brain, but I only come up with one more chore.

I groan.

The only thing I really need to do is talk to Gabriel. I gently lift sprinkles up off my lap and set him down.