Love Is Full Of Surprises

Chapter 31

A week after having the baby, Meryl started feeling down. She wouldn't let Don touch her and she just felt disgusting. She loved her baby and Don more than anything but she just felt different. She started covering the baby up and went into his room when she would nurse him. Whenever Don would ask what was wrong she said she was fine, that people kept dropping by and she wanted to be covered up when she nursed. Don knew she was lying and tried to assure her every chance he got, but he could feel her pulling away. Her mother told him just to be patient, and that Meryl had alot to adjust to.

***

It was the Wednesday morning before Thanksgiving, and Meryl was taking a shower so Don was taking care of the baby. He just couldn't get the baby to stop crying. "Okay, buddy, let's go get your mom." Don said as he carried him into the bathroom.

***

Meryl stood at the bathroom counter, looking at herself, naked, in the mirror, with tears streaming down her face. She thought she felt unattractive when she was pregnant, it was nothing compared to how she was feeling now. She had a big scar on her stomach, she still had baby fat, she had stretch marks, and her nipples were huge. She stood there for the longest time, not hearing Don coming in with a crying Henry.

"God, you're beautiful." He said admiring her. He really thought she was. He loved the changes in her body, it produced the beautiful baby that he was holding in his arms.

Meryl jumped, embarrassed, and grabbed a towel to wrap herself up in. "Jesus Christ Don, the door was closed for a reason." She yelled as she wiped her tears.

"Are you crying?" He asked worried. "What's wrong?"

"No, I'm fine. What are you doing? God, what is with you and your Dad just staring at my bare breasts without my consent." She snapped. Don stood there, hurt. He had put up with all of her mood swings, but she had just compared him to his father. "And why are you just letting him cry?" She asked exasperated.

"I came in here because he's hungry and my finger wasn't cutting it anymore. Don't worry I won't look at you again without your permission. For the record, I'm NOT my father." He snapped back as he gave Henry to her and walked off.

Meryl stood there feeling like complete shit. He had been nothing but loving, caring, and understanding through the pregnancy and the birth. She was just embarrassed that he was standing there watching her without her knowledge while she was feeling so insecure. Meryl walked out with a still crying Henry as she saw Don getting his keys and putting his coat on. "Where are you going?"

"I need to go pick up some things before we go to your parents later." He said looking at his list and not looking up at her.

"We can do that on our way out of town. Let me feed him and we can talk." Meryl said. She didn't want to talk to him about this, but standing there and watching him basically ignore her broke her heart, and she knew she needed to be honest about what she was feeling. In that moment she knew the way he was acting wasn't because of the way she looked, it was because he was hurt. She felt even worse knowing that she was the cause of his hurt.

"I'll be back later." He said as he walked off.

Meryl stood there crying. He never left without saying "bye" or "I love you" or a kiss to her cheek. Even if he was angry, they at least exchanged pleasantries. She had hurt him in the worst way possible, by comparing him to his father especially after he had just overcome his own fears about being a father and becoming like his father. She knew how upset he was that his father had been staring at her breasts, but she used that against him. She just felt out of control, all she wanted was him to hold her and for her to tell him how much she loved him. Henry's cries became more and more insistent. "I'm sorry, baby." She said kissing his head. "Mommy will feed you." She choked as she carried him into the nursery and covered them both with a blanket, since she was only in a towel, and nursed him. She just wanted Don to come home so they could talk.