Cold Feet (COMPLETED)

Peony

Ok, I bet some of you have quickly drawn conclusions from the cliffhanger of the last chapter.  Based on the comments I read, it's really easy to deduce what that woman is doing there. But there's always a logical explanation for things happening.  So here's where you find out the reason behind the woman's presence in Richard's bed. 

I think all of us have experienced having one person we want to forget, get rid of, or not want to see anymore. Yet that person keeps resurfacing in our life, reminding us of things we want to move on from and forget already. This is what that woman is all about. 

Read on and let the back story of Richard and Shayne unfold. Do share with me what you think of her and if Richard was right to break things off with her. Enjoy!

Richard shook his head and sighed. Shayne got into his apartment again with her set of keys, slept in his bed as though things were still the same between them. She was almost naked in her lace underwear and satin top, the blanket partially covering her body.

There used to be a time when Shayne only needed to crook her finger and he would be at her beck and call. She was one of the most sought after commercial models two years ago, and rival networks were competing to get her as their talent. But that was before she started drinking, and sullied her reputation by reporting to her shoots drunk or hung over.

"Shayne, you don't live here anymore."

She got out of bed, one breast peeking out of her top, her hair an unkempt mess, her make-up all smeared. She staggered toward him, wrapping an arm around his neck and grabbed his butt to rub  her lower body against his. But Richard was unmoved, and merely removed her arm around his neck and walked towards the bathroom.

"Hon......I miss you. I miss us," She slurred, trying hard to focus her eyes on him.  

"How much money do you need this time, Shayne?"

She giggled, obviously high on whatever substance she was on. She smelled of cigarette smoke, stale beer and perfume. Damn, he would need to change the sheets again.

"Not money, Richard. Just take me back, please."

"Take a shower and get dressed. I'll take you home."

"But I don't want to leave," She whined, still trying to get closer to him.

"Shayne, we've been through this before. Look at yourself, you deserve better than this."

"If I turn myself in for rehab, finish the whole process.....If I get clean again, will you take me back?"

She looked at him with hopeful eyes, and for a moment his heart constricts with pain. This was not the same woman he lived with for over a year, the same one he fell in love with three years ago. He was a shy and quiet guy back then, she was the life of almost every party, the quintessential It girl who was beginning to get noticed. He liked Shayne, but felt he wasn't deserving of her.

With all the guys pursuing her, he chose to admire her from afar, but she chose him. She made the first move to befriend him, to introduce him to her circle. She played a big part in his career by being instrumental in getting his agency noticed, his ideas welcomed by the big brands.

His presence as Shayne's date in some of her parties got people curious about him, and pretty soon, he too, was a celebrity of sorts. After two years of a relatively happy relationship, his workload started to get heavier, and he had less time with Shayne. It was during these times that Shayne slowly developed a liking for all things addictive, from alcohol to more abusive substances. She went to parties alone to avoid missing him.

Suddenly Shayne felt she was the one not good enough. Her modeling projects dwindled, as a result of her substance abuse. She'd been in and out of rehab, her parents were close to giving up on her. But Richard was patient with her. He thought love would save them.

They talked and decided to live together to try to save their relationship. But sadly, Shayne was too far gone into her own world. She stole money from him to fund her addiction. Once, she attempted to sell his laptop when he got more careful about his money. It was a good thing she was selling it to someone he knew, and was alerted about the sale on time to prevent it.

"Richard, I asked you a question....."

"I heard you. Shayne, why don't you get better for yourself? Get better because you still have a bright future if you'll only focus. Don't do it for me."

"But you motivate me to be better."

"I'm not worth it, Shayne."

"Why? Is it because there's someone else?"

He looked away, feeling guilty. Although they haven't been together for almost a year now, he didn't want to hurt her. But he had to be honest.

"Yes, Shayne. We're not in a relationship yet, but I'm getting to know her."

She sank to the floor, her head in her hands, crying. The painful truth penetrated the haze in her brain, that Richard finally gave up on her for real. She started hitting herself, her fist banging on her head as she sobbed.

"Richard, I'm so sorry for hurting you.....for destroying us....."

He holds her wrist to stop the assault on herself, hugging her, his heart heavy. He hated to see her in pain. He still cared for her, but it was no longer the way he used to feel. He was frustrated that she could not move on, and that there seemed to be nothing left for them anymore as a couple.

"I'm sorry Shayne. I tried everything to stay with you but......"

"It's my fault, Richard. All mine."

He helped her stand up and seated her on the bed. He got a towel from his cabinet and gave it to her, watching as she went to the bathroom, still sobbing. He looked at her clothes heaped on the floor beside the bed, and noted that there were stains of food and alcohol in it, most likely a cocktail. He got one of his shirts laid it out on the bed.

She stepped out of the shower, her face now devoid of make-up. She had dark shadows beneath her eyes, her face pale and gaunt. Wordlessly, she got his shirt and wore it, as well as her jeans from last night. She put up her hair with a hair tie, stifling the urge to cry again.

"Come on, I'll take you home."

"No, I think I've bothered you enough. I'll just call an Uber."

"But it's early morning....."

"It's okay." 

He took some bills from his wallet and tucked them in her pocket. He fixed the buttons on the shirt she wore, feeling as though he were dressing up a child. She faced him, her red-rimmed eyes filled with pain. 

 "Richard, I'm going to get better. I mean it this time. I'll make sure the next time you see me, I'll be the same girl you fell in love with. And I will make you love me again."

He merely nodded at her solemnly. She hugged him for the last time, memorizing the feel of him, his smell, his hold on her. She kissed his cheek, her lips lingering where his dimple was, remembering those times she loved to make him smile to see his dimple deepen. She raised her hand to caress his jaw, one last time.

And then she left, vowing to herself to make good her promise to get better for him.