Maxmoefoe; why are you calling me

0.36

"How are you feeling today?" Max questions while walking in with a tray of soup and tea on it.

Numb

"I don't know what to do with myself" you say bluntly while he places the tray softly on your lap.

"i know-" Max tries to make you feel better but it just comes off like hes pittying you.

"no! you don't know! you dont know a fucking thing" You shout in reply as your numbness fades away and is replaced by anger.

"I'm sorry, this must be really hard for you" He stutters out in fear of causing another outburst from you.

Must be really hard for you?

You can't even to begin to imagen how it feels.

"It's hard to believe that someone that you've grown up with, someone that promised they'd never leave you, someone that was in love with you could be so selfish..." You say quietly as you grit your teeth while your eyes scan the room for a distraction.

"Life isn't for everyone, some people can't-" Max continues to try to comfort you but again, it feels as though he's defending Nialls actions.

"Don't say that! choosing to die when you have a healthy body is selfish! Did he even think about what it would do to us?" You gulp as tears rim your eyes, images of Niall approacing that bridge flood into your thoughts.

"Maybe all he could think about was how sad he was" He comments submissively as he hesitantly sits at the foot of your bed.

"well now i'm left broken! I have a hole in my chest that keeps getting bigger and it's going to eat me alive, Max!" Your eyes burn as all your concentraion is focused on not breaking down and crying in front of him.

"I can't fix this, this is going to take a while." He places his hand on your foot and rubs it comfortingly.

"It's weird, you spend everyday with someone, you still have messages and pictures of them on your phone but they're not there anymore... You can't just press the unblock button or make videos reality." You lay back down into bed and pull the covers over your faragile body.

"Is there anything you want me to do?" Max asks softly as he moves closer to you, sending shivers down your spine.

"Move the food away from me, I'm not going to eat it." You mutter dissmissively while you push the tray toward max and turn over on your side.

"Okay, are you sure you don't want a drink?" Max questions hopefully as you divert your attention toward him for a moment.

"whiskey" You reply sarcasticly, a small smirk appearling on your face but soon fading away.

"preferably something none alcoholic" Max rolls his eyes as he picks up the breakfast he'd made you and walks towards the door.

"coffee, black" You mutter sourly as the you begin to feel bitter again, you rip your eyes away from max and look at your phone.

"Okay, I'll be five minuets" He smiles at you in hopes of getting one in return but you ignore him and pull your phone towards yourself.

You carefully type in your password and open your photo albums up, Images upon images of you and Niall together are awaiting.

You go to the very beggining of your camera roll and click on the fist photo.

It's an old photo of you and Niall smiling like idiots while sat on a field.

The next photos of Niall pulling various sandwiches out of  a picnic bag along with a cake.

Your top lip begins to quiver as you remember exactly what the next picture would be.

You let out a small chuckle as you flick you thumb against the screen.

The next picture was of Niall yelling because you'd knocked the cake out of his hands.

You remember him complaining about how he had to go to the shop to buy this cake only for it to be thrown on the floor and eaten by ants.

Just like yesterday you feel tears begin to burn your eyes, but the feeling of sadness is replaced by nostalgia.

"I miss you already " you say to your phone as if you're talking to Niall, you gulp down any sadness and force a smile.

You sit there in silence, hoping that he'd say "I miss you too", but that could never happen again.

No more.

No more fun moments, no more Overwatch videos, no more stupid moments in the park where you drop food, no more breaking his heart....

No more Niall.

Tears start to slide down your face, as you realise the last thing you did was break his heart.

He put his heart out on the line, He risked your friendship, he risked his life, just to have a chance with you.

If only you'd said no, no to hanging out with liv when she asked you to go to the club.

You never would've met max,
oh Max,
wonderful Max.

You love Max, you really do but you begin to wonder if your love for Max is worth losing Niall.

There is no choice anymore anyway, you can barely breathe at this point, the tears have become intoxicating.

You hear footsteps coming up the stairs, Max must've finished making your coffee.

You wipe your face, desperately trying to hide the fact that you were crying.

You bite your lip, probably drawing blood, it was the only way you could think to hold in the tears.

"sorry it took me so long, I couldn't find the coffee " Max informs you as he walks into the bedroom.

"It's okay " you manage to choke out, still keeping the tears in.

Max places your coffee on the dressing table and sits next to you, without saying a word he wraps his arms around you and buries your head in his chest.

"It's okay to cry " he says soothingly as he traces circles in your back, like he always does.

"Max" you stutter out, your voice has become horse and it hurts to speak.

"yes? "He replies as he rests his chin on your head while you use his shirt as a tissue.

"Promise you'll never leave me "you begin to cry even more at the thought of losing Max and Niall.

"I'll never leave you " he reassures you as he puts his fingers under your chin so you're looking him in the eye.

"thank you " your mood changes again, all the sadness washes away and it's replaced with what seems to be numbness.

------------------------------------
Sorry for being inactive as fuckk,
A lot of shits happened recently and I haven't taken it too well.
I'm feeling better now so it doesn't matter anyway.
I'm also re-editing the WHOLE book!

(It's my birthday in six days so you guys should probably like this chapter as a present)