Ready for Anything?

Chapter 18

Rory's POV

I had been tossing and turning - not able to get to sleep, even though I'd been trying for a couple hours. Knowing he was this close, fearing he could run away again at any moment and change his mind about everything we talked about tonight. I took a couple of melatonin, even, and sleep still would not come.

I rolled over and groaned when the alarm clock read 1am. I just wanted to sleep, and deal with life in the morning. Was that too much to ask? According to my body, it was.

* * *

Finn's POV

I glanced at the clock on the night stand - was it really already after one in the morning? Nothing I could do to grab some sleep was working. I knew I needed to be well-rested and alert for her tomorrow, but I couldn't seem to force sleep to overtake me. I tossed and turned in the bed what seemed like every two seconds. I couldn't get comfortable, I was too anxious to continue our conversation from tonight.

I wished I'd brought something to occupy my mind, at least try to make myself tired, but I was stuck staring at the ceiling of a room I wasn't even sure I belonged in. I had no idea whose home I was in, where they were or when they would be back - hell, I didn't even know if they knew I was here. Wouldn't that be an awkward conversation...

I tossed and turned some more, punching the pillow as if it had something to do with my lack of sleep, and suddenly I heard what sounded like a door opening and shutting downstairs.

I would have thought I was imagining things, except I distinctly remember hearing a bell whenever I came in, and the same bell now...

I froze in place, not sure what I should do, or if I should get up and get ready to go - so I stayed right where I was as I could hear the slightest sound of footsteps coming up the stairs.

"Shit" I whispered to myself, my heart racing out of my chest now trying to figure out what to be prepared for. I'm not sure that being in your boxers in some stranger's apartment qualifies as being ready for anything...

Then I heard it. The doorknob to the apartment door was turning, slowly, and quietly. Was the apartment being robbed!? Was I going to be some sort of an accessory to a crime!?

The door pushed open quietly, and the shadow of a person poked their head in, and closed the door behind them. The shape crossed in front of a window, walking towards me, and I let out a sigh of relief when I realized who it was.

"You about scared me to death, Love. What are you doing here, are you okay?" I asked, sitting up in bed.

"I just couldn't sleep. And I kind of wanted to check on you - and see, well, if you were still here" she whispered. Hearing her lack of faith in me was upsetting, but I remember I didn't exactly do anything to deserve credit much higher than that.

"I told you - we're in this together" I whispered.

"I know. I'm just...I'm scared, Finn. I'm going to be a mom. We're going to have a baby. How's this going to work?" she asked quietly.

I patted the spot next to me on the bed and she sat down and tucked her feet under herself.

"I don't know exactly how it's going to work, Rory. I know that I'm going to go to your next appointment with you, and all of the appointments after that if it's at all humanly possible. I know that we're going to do everything we can to prepare for the arrival of our little one. I know that we both grew up with parents who love us, and we're going to love our kid so much. I know that you're going to be an amazing mom, kitten. Goodness knows you got a lot of experience with us all in college. We have so many things to figure out still, but I know that we'll figure it out together," I told her sincerely.

"Finn, I'm thirty-two years old, I don't have a job that actually pays me, and I live with my mom. I'm just not sure I can do this."

"Look at me, love." I waited for her to make eye contact with me. "Your age has nothing to do with whether or not you can do this, okay? I'm certain that between the two of us, we can find you a job that will include a paycheck. As for living arrangements, we'll figure something out for you if you don't want to live with your mom after the baby's born. We have months ahead of us to get this all squared away; we don't have to figure it all out tonight" I assured her.

"You're right. I'm just a planner, and a list-maker, and I'm so task-driven. It makes me feel better to get everything situated right away."

"Well, I think we'd both better become accustomed to a bit of chaos - we're having a baby" I chuckled.

Rory stared at me silently for a moment before speaking again.

"We're having a baby, Finn" she whispered.

"That's what I hear, yes."

"I'm pregnant. With our child. Wow" she said in awe.

"I'd kind of expected that you already would have had this moment of realization" I said quietly.

"I have, several times. It's just...having you here with me has made it incredibly real."

"Is it okay that I'm here?" I asked quietly. I wasn't sure if I wanted to know the answer to that question.

"Of course, Finn. I...I could do this myself if I had to, but I don't want to. I want you here with us" she answered as her hand unconsciously went to her still-flat stomach.

"Then I'm here, Rory. I screwed up royally over the last few weeks, but I won't leave you now. I'm just a phone call away anytime you need me - and I'll actually answer when you call from now on" I said with a sheepish smile.

She laughed, a beautiful, happy laugh, and yawned.

"You look exhausted" I told her gently, but her eyes were already starting to drift closed. She just nodded and curled into the blankets. I watched her for a few minutes as she fell asleep and swallowed the lump in my throat. Perhaps the guy I met at the bar, Chris, was right. Maybe if I was willing to give it everything, someday I would have everything I wanted. I gently laid Rory down, kissed her on the forehead, and covered her up.

"Sleep tight, love" I whispered quietly before moving to the couch for the night. I wanted so badly to stay in that bed, feeling her warmth as I slept, but I wanted to go slow. If I was going to hope for any of this to work - friends or otherwise - I couldn't push her into anything she wasn't comfortable with. But just having her there, knowing she was there with me and sleeping peacefully nearby, for tonight that was enough.