The Girl They Never Noticed

Chapter 48

AN: If you were wondering about the text message Jaycee received from the unknown number... it was just a figment of his imagination :) that's why it was never brought up again.... because he doesn't remember it :)
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It's been two days since I last heard his voice.

Two days since I felt the warmth of his embrace.

Two God forsaken days since I last spoke to him.

And it is killing me.

It's tearing me apart.

I can't stand the pain that my heart radiates.

It's unbearable.

But it's for the best, I know.

It has to be.

Yeah maybe if you say that enough times, you could actually start to believe it.

Conscious. Darling. Shut it.

I never thought, in my entire life, that I would ever love someone this much.

That leaving them would affect me this much.

Hurt me this much.

Ruin me this much.

This sensation that I am currently feeling is that of suffocation. The longing hurt me so much that it feels like I'm drowning on air. I can't breathe, because every time I do; it hurts.

My lungs burn.

My throat constricts.

What's even worse is that I don't think he'll understand. He wouldn't understand that I needed to see my parents. He won't ever understand that I need to keep them safe; all of them.

He won't understand.

But that's fine.

Even if that means he'll never talk to me again; I'm okay with that.

If he doesn't want to ever look at me again; I could live with that.

If he never wants to hold me again and whisper how much he loves me in my ear; I'm okay with that.

I could live without him.

I could.

Right?

Right?

Dear God please tell me that I could. That I don't need him with me to be able to live.

Please.

Because if it was up to me, I know that I would die without him.

I'm nothing without him.

I've always needed him one way or another.

Just his presence gives me a sense of safety.

God why does love have to be so complicated?

Why can't it be like Romeo and Juliet?

Wait, never mind.