Forbidden: Afterglow

Chapter 15

-VALERIE'S P.O.V-

"I FEEL LIKE A WHALE."
     Ninfa bursts into laughter.
"It's not funny. You made me fat."
     She just keeps laughing. Finnley walks downstairs with Zack.
"Hey mom."
"Hey Valerie."
"Be honest, Zack. Do I look fat?"
"Uhhh..." he says and then disappears.
"I AM A WHALE."
"Shamoo." Emma says.
"Shamu." Finnley corrects her.
"No. Shamoo."
"So now I'm also a cow. I'm a whale and a cow. Comfirmed by Emma."
"You're welcome." She says with a wide smile.
"She seriously doesn't have anything better to do besides calling me fat?"
"No one has actually called you fat."
"JOEL DID. JOEL STRAIGHTUP SAID I WAS FAT. LIKE A MONTH AGO."
     Ninfa shrinks inward. "I. Am. Right. Here. No need to yell through a fucking mind channel that can hear me whisper if I was to."
"Fine. Sorry. But still."
"You look pregnant, mom. Not fat. Pregnant."
"Very helpful, Finnley. What made you guess?"
    He rolls his eyes. "You poor thing."
"Hey. No. No. No. Don't do that to me. Same thing I said when you ran into the wall at 2. I am not a wounded Finnley."
"Sorry, mom. You're crazy. I'ma go this way." He turns the other way and leaves. "See you in the morning for work, mom."
    I sigh. "I want it."
"You can't."
"I want the coffee. I haven't had any in like a month. I want coffee."
"We have to go to bed. You can have some in the morning."
"How much is some?"
"A cup. A coffee cup."
"Oh. Yeah. The really large coffee cup? Ooo... or the thermos?"
"No. Like 8 oz."
"Nooooooooooo."
"Let's get to bed, Emma." Ninfa take her and starts heading up the stairs.
    I follow behind. The stairs look like a really rocky mountain hike. One of the ones that you're just like..no.
    And I'm on limited magic usage. Teleporting is so much harder now. Finnley has to do that for us.
    I feel like a beached whale looking at the ocean thinking that it's right there. And it is. The top of the stairs is right there. Right there but so far away.
    I sigh and begin walking up the stair. One by one. This. This.. this sucks.
    I love my unborn son. I do. Very much. And I love this feeling. I do. Very much. But holy shit do I feel like a bluebarry umpa lumpa.
"Do you need help?"
"Noo. I do not need help."
"I can help you. Blinking would be faster."
"Nin.. no."
    I make it to the top stair. Never. Really. Once. In. 20 something years. Have I. Been so out of breath. It's killer.
     Ninfa takes my hand and blinks to the bedroom. A walk I probably could have made by myself. If I wasn't fat I wouldn't need help.
"You're not fat."
"I am. I really am."
"You're almost due."
     A day I will be both glad and sad. Glad to hold our son. Sad because I would feel slightly empty again. Empty in the carrying a life form kind of way.
"Do you want me to get your fuzzy socks?"
"...Why are you being nicer to me?"
"Because I know what you're going through. The days you'd give me foot massages and fuzzy socks when I was pregnant were the days I cherished."
"I did that like almost every day for you."
"Exactly."
    It does sound super heavenly. She hasn't offered in a while, not like I would. But she's busy a lot. So am I. But.. it does sound like paradise.
"What's the catch?"
"Nothing. Just saying. I could actually be helpful if you'd ask."
"You know I don't ask for help."
"You should." 
    She gives what was offered. Nice foot massage and fuzzy socks.  But it still doesn't help me. ..help from feeling like a beached fucking whale.
"I wish you'd smile."
"I can't. I'm too fat."
"Stop it. You are a billion times worse than I was with complaining. Holy hell."
    I don't get why but that's funny to me.
"At least you smiled?"
"By making me laugh to your wording."
"Holy hell seems pretty legit with you."
"Which is why I thought it was funny."
    She sighs heavily. "You, my love, are exasperating."
"I feel like I have said that to you before."
"I'm pretty sure you have. But in this case, you need it. You're so bad."
"Fat. Blame the fat."
    She rolls her eyes in laughter. "You're not fat. You're beautiful. He's almost ready."
"Yeah. But. Like when? I know I'll feel sad when he comes into the world but I will also feel a lot less fat."
"Are you going to tell him that he made you feel fat?"
"No. The kids will have no probably doing that for me. Along with telling each other that they made you feel fat too."
"That is true. Very true."
"See? No worries."
    I sigh. She takes my hand and lightly squeezes it.
"I hate not being able to hold you closer."
"I know, Val."
    She nuzzles her head between my neck and the pillows. Instantly bringing me to smile. Even if I can't properly hold her, this woman is awesome.
    I have to admit though, this kid. He will be kicking ass. His kicks hurt and that's coming from someone who is almost use to all physical torture.
"His kicks are deadly. I swear this kid isn't sleeping with us."
"Is he kicking right now?"
"N.." just before finishing the word he starts kicking. I take in a deep breath. "Mhm."
"Now you know how I felt."
"You say that every time he kicks. That's just evil."
"Emma was worse than Dakota and Finnley. In and out of womb."
    I still feel so bad about that. And it was right after Dakota woke from her coma. And right when Zack decided to move in. Hectic times.
"Would you think about doing it again?"
"Hm?"
"Being pregnant?"
"I..I don't know. Possibly. Not any time soon."
"Nooo. I think I'm good on kids for a while."
"We still need to have that talk."
"I'm not having that talk. There's nothing to talk about."
"There is. Neither of us know what's going to happen, Nin."
"I'm NOT."
    Her yelling the word scares me. I never mean to get scared at things I shouldn't deal fear to but this is rare. And she made me jump.
"I'm sorry. I just don't want to go there, Valerie."
"W..We have to.."
"We don't. You will be fine."
    Even if I am God, Satan and all things power, I can't be sure of those things. But little does Ninfa know, my magic will be transferred to my other heart. Her. If I die, she will go on. Even if she doesn't want to.
    I did this so long ago. In case of really anything. I didn't think about this but I guess it would work. Will. If.
"Are you mad at me?"
"No?"
"Scared of me?"
"No."
"You flinched."
"Y..Yes. I did."
"So you're afraid of me?"
"No. Just that your raised your voice."
"Me."
"Ninfa, please don't. Please. Just don't do this."
"I scared you though."
"Split second. I love you no matter what. It doesn't matter. And I understand."
"Forgive me."
"Yeah but nothing to be forgiven."
"We've just come too far. I can't lose you now. Not with everything we went through just to have a little minute of happiness."
"I know. I know, baby. I know. I know." I turn slightly and kiss her forehead. "I'm not going anywhere. It was a just in case."
"I don't want to. I don't. Ever. Please, Valerie. I don't want to ever think of that."
"It's okay. It's okay. I know. I understand. I feel the same."
    I guess I won't tell her. Maybe I'll write a will. Strange to ever think that I'd need to. Or maybe a letter to just tell her. And give it to Joel. Just in case.
    I sigh to the new and aggressive kicks. "I think maybe he will be a kick boxer."
"Are you okay? Do you need anything?"
"Nice night rest with my wife. It's all I could ever ask for."
"Anything for you."
    I kiss her forehead. And hold her close to me, as close as she's able to get. And her arm carefully drapes over my big belly.
    I fall asleep easily. But one thing I hear before I do is one thing, I am thankful I have.
"I love you so much, Valerie."
    Only sad that In too far asleep to respind. I fall faster knowing she loves me. That I always have a reason to wake up.