Parallel What?

46. Solitude and Suffering

Violeta's POV

Today is a brand new day. Positivity has sustained people through darkest of times, and worrying has pushed people in decent situations down the drain. With that mantra I tried to reason, but how can I reason when the base of the problem seems so unreasonable? Yesterday was a roller coaster ride. The situation I am in, seems rather peculiar. But when I collapsed last night, Xander softened up. He was by my side comforting me. In my world, people said to many times that Communication was the key. I never doubted that. But perhaps finding 'Comfort in Solitude' once in a while isn't so bad. I and Xander decided to take a walk in the garden, recollecting last night brought a smile to my face.

We were both in the swing, he handled the swinging speed and I just relaxed. He wound his arm around me and I didn't protest, he wasn't angry anymore. I failed to understand what exactly would have made him angry, it was apparent to me that even though he seems the possessive type, it really isn't me meeting a guy that triggered his reaction. Then what? For a woman, who was ready to marry this unknown guy the lack of curiosity to know the answer baffled me. If I had to force myself to retrospect, my liking for Xander comes from the fact that he is everything I am not. He is perfect. That wouldn't be so wrong, if it just wasn't limited to that. But I couldn't blame myself,  how much time I really had to know this person?

The garden is something I feel more connected to. Strange. It is exactly how I would have wanted. The garden I feel like speaks the truth, the eternal one. This way that I feel here, it's almost spiritual.

Between me and him, there was silence, we were together, but I felt alone, the good alone. The time of night I remember of him was when he gave me a kiss. I didn't protest but I didn't reciprocate either, he had mellowed and he was persuasive. His hand held both mine and he pushed my shoulder into him further. And the environment was conducive, the kiss though came at a time that I suppose I was going to reach some realisational moment, or perhaps I was over thinking.

He excused himself this morning, he told he had somewhere to be. He told me that he would take care of wedding, that I should just take the day of and enjoy. I found myself back at the garden. I spent a few hours there, it felt like moments, when suddenly, I saw Theo come running. It was evening already.

"What are you doing here Theo? You shouldn't be here."

"I want to tell something to you, I need you to come with me now."

I don't know why, but even after spending hours in the garden I didn't want to go from there. But something inside me seemed to call. It felt like my Mother's voice coming from his mouth. I had to go. As I followed him, to the car and back to the research center. He pulled me there, I couldn't hold the curiosity but I didn't want to ask, something was telling me that everything is going to go downhill from here, or atleast the path of life is going to change. As I was pulled into the room and infront of Mr. Petrakis and Mr. Mehta. They looked prepared with huge equipments and yet as soon as they saw me their face held guilt. They were about to say something when, Xander burst open through the door. He was very angry and at the same time looked extremely handsome.

The way I was feeling today, seemed more intense than yesterday. Yesterday, I felt alone and a spiritual connection. Today I feel lonely and to be in huge suffering. The thoughts swirled in my mind. As I looked at Xander, I remembered the garden and him and me there. I leapt forward and jumped in his arms. His anger didn't bother me, neither did the sight of people staring at us. It just felt to comfortable. He slowly lifted me in the same position and walked out, not before warning Theo, "Don't get in my business ever again you bastard." His words were harsh, but I didn't even flinch, I just held on to him.

As he carried me out in same position and out me down, his arms tightened around me. It felt comforting and constricting at the same time. Theo came running behind me, I could see him

I didn't know what to do. His face had anxiety written all over it. Somehow he didn't look like my previous world crush to me any longer, his worried face started resembling my father's. He didn't say a single word. I could close my eyes, bury my fave in Xander's neck and relax and rest. I felt tired. With Xander, things seem easy and just lovely. But I couldn't close my face. The connection I felt at the garden, the oneness and some truth, that I perhaps am not able to see, that is exactly the vibe Theo gave. It is puzzling. With Xander, is the garden, the luxury and comfort of it. With Theo, seems to be its essence. I released Xander, he refused to let go. His hold on me tightened even further. Theo perhaps saw what was happening. But before I could know any further. The overwhelming emotions and over processing my environment and thoughts, I collapsed. Last thing I saw was the beautiful concerned face of Xander, perhaps the Perfect Man, and as much as I hated to admit, the one with Perfect Life to offer, I fell in his strong arms, his hand shook my face. But in an unlikely way, my previous world Crush Theo, the one starting to sound like my Mom and look concerned like my Dad was becoming more and more prominent. I passed out.

Sorry people for the halt. Hopefully one more chapter and Epilogue, will wrap up my first story. If you are reading this, please know I am greatful.

Also just a warning, this story took a massive turn and it's ending could make you hate me completely. But I couldn't just continue the story the way I started. Sorry:)
Thank You.