Hidden Photos

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"I'm so sorry Baby," I spoke to my car, gently wiping away the crumbs that had accumulated on her leather seats. "I won't let you get so dirty next time."

It was true. This was the dirtiest I had let my precious car get in quite some time. With her dusty fenders, crumbs littering the seats and trash thrown in the backseat, she looked a mess. But with hunt after hunt, I hadn't had time to clean her out. Not until today, our first day off in quite some time.

Taking my time, I brushed away the crumbs from nameless fast food joints, pulling out a cheeseburger wrapper that had been trapped in the seat. I had a trashcan beside the car, and it was filling fast with empty beer bottles and soda containers.

Once the trash was gone, I went about wiping her down, using the specialty wipes I had found at the local auto part store. Making sure her entire surface was clean, I even reached under the seat, planning on wiping the metal brackets under there when a piece of paper caught my eye.

Thinking I had missed a piece of trash, I reached down for it, almost falling over in the process.

Pulling out where I could see it, I could feel my blood rush south, my face going pale, my mouth suddenly dry.

Reaching over, I turned off the radio, shutting the door so I could sit there in silence and stare at a painful reminder of the past.

It was an older photograph, having been taken at least three years ago. I had completely forgotten about it. Y/N was smiling up at the camera, her smile so beautiful, so carefree. Her arms were wrapped around my waist, holding on tight while I stared down at her, my eyes full of love.

It took me a minute to realize I was crying. One simple tear that slid down my cheek was soon joined by another, and then another. "Oh Y/N," I whispered, brushing my thumb along the picture, remembering how smooth her skin was, how soft it always felt under my embrace. "I thought I was okay. "I thought I didn't miss you, but then I saw your photo."

I don't know how long I sat there, staring at the reminder of the best thing that happened to me. Tears continued to fall gently as I remembered all the amazing times Y/N and I had shared. She had been so sweet, so kind but with such a strong will at the same time. She kept me on my toes, always there for me when I needed her the most. She had been able to understand me better than anyone else, including my own brother.

But that had been three years ago. And in a Hunter's life, that was as good as fifty. I had pushed her away, knowing I was going to Hell, and I would probably never make it back. Seeing the hatred in her face was better than having her watch me go through the torture I had to face. And in the end, I had to admit watching her walk away hurt more than the Hellhounds claws ever did.

Staring down at the picture I remember when I was pulled back out of Hell. After finding Bobby and Sam, finding Y/N had been the next thing on my list. It hadn't been easy, that was for sure. She had changed her name, moved to a city I had never heard of. Turning into a civilian. I had sat outside her house for hours, watching through the window as she lived her life. Kissing a handsome man, having friends over for dinner. Things I never could give her.

It had killed me that day to drive away. Leaving her to live a normal life. But I did, because I loved her. I had burned everything that had reminded me of her, shoving every single memory to the back of my mind. Everything about her was gone, except for this picture that had somehow survived.

And all it took was one little picture for me to remember. To remember what it was like to hold her in my arms. To have her stare up at me as if I was the only person in the world. That our love would never fade. Pulling out my phone, I clicked through my contacts, seeing her name still there. It was the only thing of hers I had forced myself to keep. Promising myself that it was only if she was in trouble. I had never used it, but I wanted nothing more right now than to press the button and hear her voice on the other end of the line.

Feeling foolish, I moved to put my phone away, but my finger skimmed the button, pressing call. Holding my breath, I heard it ring, once, twice. Telling myself to hang up, I froze when she answered. "Hello?"

I sat there, knowing I should hang up. That I was going to ruin everything that she had worked so hard to create for herself. But I couldn't help myself. Seeing her picture, and hearing her voice had made me realize exactly how lonely I was. And even if it did nothing else, maybe it would finally give me closure. "Hi Y/N." 

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