An hour or so later, the girls are settled on the couch; sitting close enough that their knees are touching. Taylor's body is angled towards the model's, leaning into her side with Karlie's arm draped around her shoulder. An episode of Grey's Anatomy is playing on the tv, but neither girl has really been paying much attention to the show.
Karlie is still bothered by the fact that Taylor still so readily thought she could just up and leave her for no reason. She understands the fears and insecurities the songwriter has, but she really wishes the girl could just open up to her. She just wants to understand.
Similarly, Taylor is ashamed of the way she handled the entire situation. She jumped to conclusions based on her past experiences, even though Karlie has never done anything to warrant that kind of distrust. She almost lost Karlie over it. And the worst part of it, was it all would have been her own fault. She tilts her head back and closes her eyes, exhaling a deep sigh.
"I'm not going to push you, but I really want you to know you can talk to me about anything. Nothing you have to tell me is going to make me run. I promise." Karlie reaches down and squeezes the songwriter's hand that was resting between their bodies. "I just want to understand." She says timidly.
Taylor opens her eyes and tilting her head to look at the model; finding nothing but unwavering patience, care, and devotion in those gorgeous green eyes.
She sighs heavily before lifting her head up, turning her body to face the model; Karlie mirroring her position. "It reminded me of the way things ended with my ex."
Karlie's eyes widen in surprise, not having expected Taylor to talk about it again. She squeezes the songwriter's hands but doesn't say anything; giving the girl time to continue. She knew this was going to be really hard on her girlfriend.
"We were doing so well and everything was great, and then out of nowhere, she grew distant on me. She wouldn't come over as much, and if she did, she was always late, or she had an excuse why she couldn't stay. At first she would just brush it off and say she was tired or she had work. The phone calls became fewer and far between, and even the texts slowed. I tried to plan cute dates for us and surprise her, but she kept slipping away. Whenever I would confront her about it, she'd flip everything on me and accuse me of being clingy, possessive, and controlling." She takes in another deep breath, coming to the most painful part of the story.
"She agreed to come to my birthday, which I was really excited about because all my friends were going to be there. She'd met a few of them before, but she never really interacted with any of them. If we went out or hung around other people, she would really only talk to me, which is fine because I knew she was a little shy, but I never really realized she did it to keep me away from my friends. She didn't like that I was so close with them and that's why she didn't come out with us a lot of the time. Anyway, I was really looking forward to her being there because things had been rocky with us for awhile, but she promised me she'd be there." The songwriter sighs, blinking back tears.
***Flashback***
It wasn't that she didn't appreciate all the effort her friends went through to throw her this party; it's just that the one person she wanted to see more than anything was missing. Taylor didn't really like celebrating her birthday. She didn't like having all the attention on her and it felt weird to basically ask people to come celebrate her being born. Now, when it came to her friend's birthdays on the other hand, she went all out. She loved celebrating other people's birthdays. But that's just another double standard she holds herself to.
But when she found out through her girlfriend that Lily and Emma had already planned a whole surprise party for her, she couldn't really say no. They invited all of Taylor's closest friends, even co-workers and people she's met through different industries. Everyone was going to be there.
