Addicted | Yoonmin✔

|twenty eight|

Nothing compares to what we share
I don't have a care in the world
And as long as you're around
I'll be safe and sound

"Hello. I'm Yoongi, an addict."

"Hi, Yoongi."

Fuck, that made him cringe every time.

Yoongi had prepared a whole speech the night before about what he wanted to say. Hoseok encouraged him to share exactly how he felt and what happened, because keeping quiet won't help worth shit. The words were even written in his journal. Well, it was mostly his lyric book, but sometimes he had to dot his thoughts down when they get to intense to bottle up.

Okay, so I got myself a boyfriend a while ago. It's been nearly a month now, or a bit longer than a month, shit I don't know. I barely remember my birthday? Yes, he's fucking adorable. He's not like...nothing like my past. I was scared at first to be with him, because I didn't want to fuck him up. Yet, one thing led to another, you know? I didn't want to make him feel worthless and like I was just using him, so I agreed to be his boyfriend. It's scary. This hope, and this happiness, it's foreign.

"I recently got a boyfriend. We're very happy. He's good for me."

I want to study music. Namjoon is going to study music part-time while he's working as a teacher, and I want to study with him. I wrote my GED today, and I'm getting the results in a week. It was easy, though. I studied hard. Jimin wants to study dancing at Korean Institute For Arts, and I know it's a long shot...but I like to imagine myself studying there as well. Music, that is. And one day, I'll put together a mix-tape and fuck me, I want to become a rapper and Jimin will be my back-up dancer.

"I wrote my GED today, and I hope I do well. If I passed, I'll start taking a few classes at the Community College."

My mother is very sick, but I don't have the guts to try and call her up. Instead, I've been saving up, but it's not coming on fast enough. I have other living expenses, and a boyfriend. I haven't even told Jimin yet, because I don't want to worry him. I'll tell him if I really can't handle it. But I've been considering dealing again. I'll stop once I have enough money. I'm strong, and I won't use, only sell. It's good money, and I'll avoid contact with Jihoon as much as possible.

"I have some problems with my past coming back to haunt me, but I'll be able to handle it."

My cravings, for a while, was subdued, but with all this extra stress I've been experiencing recently, they've started resurfacing again. At least I'm always busy. Jimin makes me forget about the cravings sometimes. He's such a good soul.

"The cravings are the same as always, I guess."

I dreamt about a future where everything was okay. In this future, I was married to Jimin. He was making breakfast while singing along to some Charlie Puth song on the radio, or was it Hey There Delilah? Anyways, and on his finger was a glistening silver band. I had a matching one. He turned to me and smiled, holding up a piece of bacon for me to eat. I woke up crying my eyes out.

"I'm starting to have hope for a better future."

But then, the next night, the dream started the same way, but the bacon turned into a syringe and Jimin turned into Jihoon. I woke up feeling numb.

I woke up feeling nothing.

"So yeah, I'm doing good."

Yoongi ended up not sharing how he really felt, but that's okay. He's good with dealing on his own.

The small crowd applauded as Yoongi sat back down, Hoseok immediately leaning in to give Yoongi a side hug (which Yoongi reacted to by pushing Hoseok's face away, but he still managed to get in a little bit of hug time). "You did well, hyung!" Hoseok said, ruffling Yoongi's hair. The elder rolled his eyes and crossed his legs, folding his hands over his knee.