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107

Yoongi wasn't crying when Jimin opened his bedroom door without even knocking, he was simply just sitting there against the headboard, staring straight ahead at his black walls with a blank look.

In Jimin's opinion he looked okay, but he knows Yoongi is one that hides his emotions well.

With hesitatent steps he makes his way into the room, shutting the door quietly and walking over to the bed.

He stands next to it, staring down at the older who seems to just ignore his presence in the room.

"Hyung..." Jimin let's out, looking the older's blank look over with a sad expression. Yoongi doesn't respond, so Jimin joins him on the bed, sitting next to him, his own body also leaning on the headboard. "Everyone's sorry about what happened... we didn't- I didn't know about..... you know..."

Yoongi remains quiet, eyes never leaving his walls.

"I'm admitting what we did was fucked up. Jin hyung told us what happened to you in the past. I just- we, we wanted to know that you cared about Taehyung."

This causes the older blonde's eyes to finally leave the wall, Turning his head to his boyfriend, his blank look still prominent. "Really? So you also view me as a person that hates Taehyung? Does everyone in this house assume I actually hate him?"

"No, hyung, it's not like that." Jimin quickly says. "We knew you love him, he even did at some point. He just... after what you said the other day he seemed to doubt if you actually did."

"Fine. Tell him keep that same energy."

"Yoongi, what the hell? I understand that you're upset but you won't actually stop talking to Taehyung over this, right? Besides, you were in the wrong from before--"

Calmly, Yoongi stands up from his spot on the bed, walking in the direction of the door and opening it. He points to the outside "And choosing your best friend over your boyfriend, I want you to keep that energy too. Now kindly leave."

The younger's eyebrows furrows "You're not serious right now, are you?"

"As Jungkook would say, I'm deadass." Yoongi deadpans, his expression never changing.

"But, Yoongi--"

"But Yoongi nothing." This time Yoongi frowns. "Even after you heard what happened to me, why I reacted like that, you're still worrying about Taehyung's feelings more than mines."

Jimin gets off of the bed, walking over to Yoongi "It's not like that, I just want you guys to make amends. This whole thing is stupid."

Yoongi scoffs "When it was about Taehyung's feelings it was super urgent, very important. Now it involves how I feel and it's all stupid?" He grips the door knob, gaze glaring daggers at Jimin. "Seriously, Jimin, just get out. I want to be alone for a while."

"How you feel isn't stupid, but this whole situation is. It got blown out of proportion."

The older raises a hand to his face, eyes going soft "Maybe how I feel is stupid..." He mumbles, Jimin's glad tilting.

"Hyung, what do y--"

"Maybe these feeling I have are stupid.... My dad was right... I'm a waste... homosexuality is dumb... I should've never told you how I felt and just let it b--"

"Yoongi.... you don't mean that." He uses both of his hands to grab Yoongi's free one, the one that wasn't holding the door knob. He squeezes it.

The older slowly slides his hand out of Jimin's grasp, passing that same hand through his hair as he lets out a breath, turning his head to the side, not letting Jimin see his glossy eyes.

"Just go, Jimin. I-I need some time to think for myself... to really think about what I want.... I thought I was over everything my dad said... but I'm clearly not."

The younger wasn't having it, he didn't want Yoongi to dwell so hard on the past, to let his father control his feelings and thoughts "Yoongi--"

"Jimin--"

"Just listen to me!" Yoongi eyebrows raises in suprise at the sudden shout from Jimin, and then he immediately notices Jimin's clearly deflated look.

The slightly shorter shuts the door, removing Yoongi's hand from the door knob as he does so. He grabs the both of Yoongi's bigger ones, his bottom lip between his teeth.

"I just want to say this, and if you still want to think about it I'll leave and I won't bother you again because this isn't fair to the both of us." He starts, gripping Yoongi's hands tighter "It isn't fair to you because you were hurt and degraded by someone you thought would always be there for you. And it isn't fair to me because I can't be sitting around the entire time, waiting for whenever you choose to make up your mind if you even want to still be with me."

Yoongi timidly nods his head, allowing Jimin to continue.

"I understand that you're still  hurt about what happened between you and you're dad, but letting it still effect you to this extent will honestly lead you to not being happy with yourself."

"You obviously want to be with what makes you happy, but you're father's words are like chains keeping you grounded under the sea, you're struggling to breath and you can't get to the surface to save yourself. If you continue letting the chains hold you down you'll eventually suffocate and sink to the bottom of the sea, and that usually never ends well. Break your chains, Yoongi."

He doesn't receive a response, just the older's eyes looking into his, he could see all the years of hurt in them.

"I know we aren't together for so long, but I really like you, Yoongi." He looked like he was holding back tears, not wanting to cry infront the older, Yoongi could see that. "If- if I were to leave, like right now. Never to burden you again... Would you let me walk away? Or would you break your chains and chase after me?"

He awaits for the response of the other, his hands squeezing Yoongi's hands tighter without even realizing it. He waits and waits, but when nothing leaves the older's mouth he gently let's go of Yoongi's hands, a sinking feeling in his stomach and chest.

He nods slowly, tears threatening to fall from his eyes "Okay... I understand..."

He opens the bedroom door, walking out of the room, leaving a crying Yoongi standing there.

Jimin walks with a slump in his shoulders, tears in his eyes as he heads in the direction of the stairs at a slow pace.

When he reaches the stairs, ready to descend them, he lets out a small yelp when he's suddenly dragged backwards into a back hug, feeling someone's face press against his shoulder.

The spot they have their face slowly begin to get wet, their body jittering against him as they speak, their voice low.

"I-I'm sorry, J-Jiminnie.... I'm a-a coward."

The younger blonde turns around in the hold, wrapping his arms around Yoongi's shoulders as Yoongi grips onto his clothing.

He is so proud of Yoongi at this moment. Placing a soft kiss on the side of his hair, a smile playing on his lips as tears still escaped his eyes.

"You're not a coward, hyung. Look you did it... I'm proud of you."

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I seriously need to stop not uploading for long periods of times.