Islamic Stories,Rays of Guidance ✓

Story of a Revert

AMERICAN CONVERT TO ISLAM - MY REVERT STORY

Bismillah ar Rahman ar Raheem,

Asalaamu alaikum (may peace and blessings be upon you) my name is Chelsey. I go by Chelsey Love on social media since I am, well, the lovey, free spirit type. I wasn't born in California, although I did live there for 5 years. I was born in Florida...close enough I guess. I grew up on the sandy vacation beaches of our coast and lived most of my life in sandals, shorts and tank tops. I did all the "normal" things an American girl does. I competed in gymnastics and cheerleading. I dabbled in ice skating and realized my grace was a bit more like a hockey player. By the time I was eleven years old, I was already concerned with my beauty, my weight and boys. At 15 years old I attended modeling school and started competing in USA Beauty Pageants. I loved being, well....attractive I guess, and I can honestly say a part of me always thought I may be "famous" one day. I grew up in a non religious home and really only attended church on Christmas Eve. When I was eleven I used to go to a Christian youth group, but it was mainly to sneak cigarettes behind the craft store and meet boys. Yes I was 11, I know...Please don't do this girls! At 15 I started going to this "Hip Hop" church with a pastor that had cornrows and rapped about Jesus. I thought it was mad cool, but always felt silly sitting there while Id talk to myself in my head..."You don't believe this stuff...wheres your faith Chelsey? Maybe God doesn't even exist!" May Allah forgive me...I would say this is when my Atheism started. I befriended a Palestinian Muslim girl my senior year in high school and went to the Musjid with her once during Ramadan. I ignorantly didn't even know what a Muslim was or Islam really. I just tagged along because she asked me too. She seemed like a normal girl to me, plus she told me she had an uncle that could draw me an Arabic tattoo haha this is how our friendship began actually. I had always loved Arabic script and Egyptian Mythology so she was an interesting friend to have. I loved learning about her culture and we surprisingly never even spoke about Islam.

I got married at 18 years old and moved across the country to live with my Marine Corp husband. Yes, I was married to a Marine and now I'm Muslim...some people find this part interesting. I stayed in contact with my Muslim girlfriend. She got married right after high school as I did and I flew to New Orleans a couple times to visit her. During this time I was 19 years old I believe. I bought a Quran out of curiosity to learn. As an Atheist I simply looked to religion as something interesting to learn about. I wrote a comparison and contrast essay in college on Christianity and Islam. My teacher loved it. I attempted to read the Quran, but couldn't get passed the second chapter. I remember flying to New Orleans and on my flight all I wanted to do was sit and read. I got through a few pages and got interrupted by the gentleman sitting next to me who would not shut up the entire flight. I swear it was some interference from the Shaytan. I didn't pick up the Quran to read it after that until I was 25 years old. During the next five years as an Atheist I indulged in what I thought was "living life". I partied a lot, tried new things to find out who I was and where I belonged. I got tattooed a lot, pierced, drank a lot. I thought I was on the path to being "famous"...I guess...I got my Cosmetology license, modeled, started going to auditions in L.A. I was really enjoying living in California and I was building a pretty cool life for myself (according to western standards I suppose). When I first moved back to California (I went back and forth due to my husbands deployments overseas) I went through a small personal issue that had me wishing there was a god but just couldn't grab a hold of belief. I remember praying to God once when I first moved to California. I stated..."If you exist...can you help me to believe in you..." I made promises I didn't live up to because after all how could I stop my desires for something intangible?...That previous 9 months had seriously been the most depressing, up and down, happy, sad, lonely with tons of friends; moments of my life and I'm a pretty happy, consistent person. But regressing to my move back to California, I had been living there almost two years and started to think everything was slowly working out for me, my husband (at the time) found out he was to be shipped out overseas for the third time. I had two weeks to drop my college courses, pack my stuff and move back to Florida. Instead of moving back with my parents I decided to live on my own with a roommate. I roomed with my good friend whom I went to Cosmetology school with.