Smile For Me

Chapter 13 - Movies And Games

I was confused yet again when Eddie returned in the late morning. I switched the lamp on and rubbed my eyes,"You're not going to work?" Eddie passed me the breakfast tray with a smile on his face. "No Janie, I don't have work today. None of us do on Sundays,"he answered. I looked down when he said that. I was kidnapped a week ago now, that was such an easy trick to pull, of course no one was there on Sunday, he just set up that appointment so it would be easy to take me away. It's been a week since I've seen my parents, a week since I've seen my friends, a week since I've been outside. A week since everything changed. I'm glad that my acting is working though, I'm slowly gaining his trust, but, I don't know how long I'll have to keep this up. He's getting way too close for comfort now, I feel sick remembering when he kissed me on the lips yesterday.

I ate my breakfast slowly while looking down, Eddie sat on the edge of the bed to watch. "So, what would you like to do today?"he asked brightly. I shrugged as I munched on my cereal, looking sad. It's going to be hard to act happy today. "Are you okay?"Eddie asked, scooting closer. I simply nodded. Eddie poked the corners of my lips and turned them upwards. "Smile for me then,"he said. I forced a smile, but it wasn't convincing. He frowned a little then began stroking my hair. "We can do whatever you want today, just say the word." I wanted to snap at him and say that I'd like to go home then, but I knew that wouldn't be an option. I shrugged again, so he made the suggestions instead.

First we did some colouring. I didn't fancy doing it, the last time I did it was when I was eleven, it's not an activity I thought about doing in years. I flicked the lid off a felt tip pen and began colouring the picture in anyway to please him, secretly sighing every now and then. Eddie coloured the other half of the page, and the picture was coming together. I couldn't help going into focus mode though, I haven't had any activities to do since I got here. It was weird not taking six hours of learning everyday anymore, my brain was almost switched off. I was just Eddie's toy that he kept in the basement, one that he kept coming back to for cuddles and company. I had a guess that Eddie was lonely, he was always available to 'babysit' me and I was his first friend. His first 'love' apparently too, he's always had that strange attachment to me. When the colouring was half finished I actually felt myself smile a little, it was starting to feel somewhat fun. That eleven-year-old me was awakening again, remembering how to enjoy this. The picture was of a couple sitting beneath a tree, a picnic with the sun setting in the distance.

I coloured the woman and Eddie coloured the man, I made the woman have blue hair even though it was supposed to be brown. "Why blue?"Eddie asked curiously. "Did you want your hair dyed? I'd rather you keep it natural though." I shook my head no and then shrugged a little, I continued to scribble. "Looks different,"I mumbled. I didn't like how he said it, as if he owned my hair, but I ignored that part. We continued in silence until a few minutes later Eddie drew a curly moustache on the man's face making me giggle a little. "Why did you do that? It looks silly,"I said. Eddie shrugged and smiled. "Looks different,"he said, copying my answer. Once we had coloured the whole picture we added stupid things to it; a giant butterfly in the sky, a pirate hat on the blue-haired woman, a pink dress to the moustache man, a green cat lurking in the tree, and a huge strawberry cake beside their picnic blanket. I haven't used my imagination like this in years, dad used to love it when I added my own things whereas mum would sigh and insist it's a waste of felt tips. Breah would just think it rather weird and childish if she knew I did this. We are being childish right now but I didn't care.

We put our pens down with satisfaction, that actually turned out to be quite fun. We then watched another movie like yesterday, but this time we'd pause it every now and then to guess what'll happen next, I guessed right most times. I paused the film,"Okay, duh, that's easy, she'll look to the left and turn back to the right before a jumpscare screams at the TV." Eddie always laughed when my predictions were true, he would ruffle my hair and say something like,"Yeah, that was too cliché." At the end of the movie we started discussing the plot and arguing about our favourite characters, but not proper arguing, just in a playful way. I nearly forgot Eddie was my kidnapper, it almost felt like a normal evening of him babysitting me, keeping me entertained like he did when I was younger.

We watched three more movies until it was lunch time, and this time Eddie ate with me so I wasn't alone. He had perfect table manners just like me and didn't wolf down his food like every other boy did at school, he was like a true gentleman. Even so, he finished before me, I was a very slow eater but he was patient.

We then continued this for hours, watching countless more films, reading and discussing different books, and completing wordsearch puzzles together. It's all the things I'd have liked to do with Breah, but she's only into girly things like shopping and would only watch funny videos with me. She had a geeky side to her, but wouldn't ever try anything new, she stuck to her one favourite anime and video game. I longed for a sibling my whole life so I could do these things with them, I like how Eddie always had the time and patience for me. But then I reminded myself, he's not playing the older brother, he likes me.

I took a bath before bed and brushed my teeth for three minutes then blowdried my hair until it was fluffy. I pulled on the purple pyjamas I wore a few nights before, I thought it looked cute with its blue and yellow patterned stars. I slid under the covers for Eddie's 'bedtime' story and I fell asleep almost immediately. Just before my eyes closed I saw him smile and shut the book silently before pressing a kiss to my cheek, I felt weird for accepting his affection that night.

* * *
I screamed at the top of my lungs which woke me up abruptly. I sat up in bed while holding my chest and panting heavily, my forehead was sweaty and my cheeks were damp with tears. I was shaking uncontrollably, I had an awful nightmare. I dreamed my parents and Breah and Calum were all murdered. I heard quick footsteps and the door burst open, Eddie also panting but in confusion. When more tears slid down my cheeks he rushed over to me with open arms, and I accepted it as I began sobbing. I hugged him back for the first time.

I had a weird feeling come back to me, one I hadn't had in years. I always had this terrified and hyped feeling when I awoke from my nightmares, but I'm older, I don't really get them anymore. I used to cry for dad to come save me from my dark bedroom, and he'd hold me and read to me until I fell asleep again. I suddenly hated this room, because the small space was getting to me. The eerie silence was filling my ears everytime Eddie left the room, and I knew I'd scream again if he left me right now. When he moved slightly I squeezed him tighter and buried my head into his chest, crying harder. I don't want to be left alone.

Eddie held the back of my head with one hand and wrapped the other around me, trying to shush me, my cries saddened him. "What happened Janie?"he whispered. I couldn't manage an answer. "Bad dream?" I nodded to that as I tried to calm myself, stopping my sobs with my fist. He shushed me more as he cradled me, and I leaned into him, letting his comfort and scent calm me. I didn't quite know what his scent was, but I was used to it and always recognised it, it made me feel safer right now. He stroked my hair lovingly and whispered,"My poor baby, come on." Eddie gently detached my arms from him to lift me up and place me back in my spot of the bed, he got under the blanket too to help me relax.

I willingly shuffled closer to him so I could lean on his shoulder this time, he wrapped his arms around me securely. I didn't want him to switch off the lamp so he left it on for me. He also turned on the TV and put on a kids show I used to watch, he set the volume on low so it wasn't too loud and impossible to sleep. I sniffed and tried concentrating on the show, Eddie watched too and cuddled me to his chest. Eventually the soft and happy sound from the TV and the warmth and comfort from Eddie put me to sleep, I felt safe.