Smile For Me

Chapter 55 - Prom

Exactly a week later, it was time for prom. I'm having to take my exams in probably a year from now, and I felt ashamed since everyone else will literally start them next week. Mum and dad came round on Friday evening, to help me get ready. Well, mainly mum, dad just came for the support and to take photos before he sees me go. Dad and Eddie had coffee and chatted in the living room, as if they were pals, but I knew Eddie was just using his charismatic personality. I wondered what he really felt about my dad and why. I took a quick bath and mum blow-dried my hair for me so it was nice and fluffy to touch.

Mum then ironed out my prom dress, even though I only wore it once on our girl's night, then she handed it to me to change into. After I had my dress, my shoes, and my jewellery on, mum even put makeup on me. I never really wore it because I looked so different with it on, and I just genuinely didn't find it fun to cake my face with it. But mum didn't change my face too much, and I let her since it was just a party. She used a bit of mascara, eyeliner, and some pink lip gloss which I tried not to taste too much. It was strawberry, so it was hard to resist at first. I looked at myself in the mirror, my face didn't look so babyish anymore, but I just shrugged. I preferred no makeup, but I'll keep it on tonight, because it's a fun occasion I guess. Lastly mum curled my hair with a curling iron Eddie had bought for me a couple days ago, and so my hair was springy once again.

I made myself smile when I stepped out of Eddie's bedroom, which was currently the makeup station, and showed dad. Dad stood up and smiled when he saw me,"Oh...Janie." Dad hugged me and claimed I looked beautiful, and as I predicted he started crying. I hugged him too and patted his back. "Dad? Dad you don't need to cry, it's just a party,"I mumbled, but seeing his tears made me want to cry a bit too. Mum saw my eyes tearing up,"James! Don't make her cry, her makeup!" But mum started crying too, and it became almost comical. I didn't actually cry myself, because I've cried too much this past year it could fill a whole swimming pool, but my eyes stung as I hugged mum and dad. Eddie watched from the sofa, he didn't really approve of makeup, not to mention my heels again, but he nodded at me so I'd feel a bit better about myself.

Eddie went to clean up the mess in our bedroom, while mum and dad took pictures of me with their ancient camera. I stood by the stairs and smiled anxiously at the camera, copying a few poses which mum told me to do. After they were both satisfied with a million photos for 'memories', I had a quick drink and trip to the bathroom, though I didn't need to pee, I think I was going to be sick. I always got like this before a party, or basically anything that might overwhelm me. I suppose Eddie was right when he said about that a week ago. I worried that I was going to have a panic attack when I get there, or just simply embarrass myself. I held my belly, praying Louise and Abby would knock on the front door now. If they don't come quickly I might back out.

I wanted comfort, and although he's the cause of my nightmares and episodes, I headed to Eddie's room, letting my parents think I was going to help him clean up the makeup. I found Eddie had already finished, he was just sitting on the bed now, fidgeting. He looked up at me and half-smiled, because he was worried about letting me go tonight. I made myself smile too and sat beside him. "You okay?"I asked, though I was wanting him to ask me that question. Eddie made an unconvincing 'mhm' sound, but then sighed a little when I stared at him, he wrapped an arm around me. "I'm sorry Janie, I just.."he didn't finish his sentence, but I already knew why he was tense. I leaned against his arm. "Eddie, you just need to learn, to trust me. You don't have to worry all the time, okay?"I whispered. Eddie stared ahead of him sadly, I think it took a lot in him to finally nod,"Okay." He kissed my head and then took my hand, smirking a little jokingly. "But just remember," -he held my ring finger- "that this finger is reserved for me." Eddie then slowly sucked on my finger which felt strange, and I giggled nervously. He let my finger go when there was a knock on the door.