Smile For Me

Chapter 21 - A Change Of Thought

The next few days Eddie was especially clingy and happy, he was always smiling and forever cuddling me now that I promised to be his. He had a half day off today so we had our usual morning of watching films together in bed. By the time it was twelve o'clock the sun was shining brighter than before so he suggested we enjoy ourselves outside in the garden once he's back from work. I felt a little excited since it was nearly March now, it's starting to get warmer out and we'll be able to plant flowers soon.

While Eddie was at work I curled up on the sofa by myself with the TV on and sighed, waiting for him to return. I never really did anything when he wasn't here, I only have fun when he's with me. I wanted to surf through the channels but remembered one of his rules, only he was allowed to touch the remote. I got bored of watching the same kids channel (which was too young for me), but I didn't disobey him. I wondered for a moment why he doesn't let me use the remote anyway, I remember him saying some channels are 'inappropriate' for me. I blushed but then giggled when I guessed it was porn. I jumped a little when I heard a tap sound from the front door, it was just the postman slipping our mail through the letterbox. I froze in my place and waited about a minute before tip-toeing over to the door to pick up the mail from the floor and place it on the kitchen counter, Eddie always reminded me to never answer the door and stay as quiet as possible when the postman comes. It wasn't like I could answer the door anyway, Eddie always leaves with all doors locked. I could just shout so the postman would hear me but I have no intention of leaving anymore.

I read the front of the letter he got, 'To Ed Sanford'. It was weird seeing it as 'Ed' since no one ever calls him that. I feel weird myself when I'm asked to sign my name, 'Jane' itself just doesn't feel right, Eddie and I have stuck to our childhood nicknames and we like it that way. When I read Eddie's name a few times I then thought of my own surname changing to Sanford, and I blushed from the very thought. I was warming up to the new name already and suddenly felt dreamy imagining what our wedding would be like. For a moment I was like one of those silly, giggly, girly-girls you read in books who write their full name in a notebook and write it out again but change their surname, drawing hearts and dreaming of their crush.

I pictured a small and cosy wedding all day and blushed again when Eddie came back. "Hey Janie,"he smiled, taking his blazer off. "How was your day sweetheart?" I ran over to hug him and said happily enough,"It was fine." Eddie and I both sat outside at the patio table as promised, just chatting and giggling quietly, he still wants us to be careful in case anyone was nearby in earshot. He made us pink lemonade which I savoured slowly, taking a small sip of it every now and then.

Eddie laughed at a particular joke I made before gently ushering me off his lap. "I just need the toilet real quick baby,"he said, kissing my cheek. I nodded then watched him head back indoors. I glanced around the garden a few times before closing my eyes, enjoying the breeze and the sun on my face. I was drunk from Eddie's love and affection, I loved how much he loved me and I loved how he was never hesitant about our future, he had it all planned out and was certain he wants to spend the rest of his years with me. I was forever smiling now and could feel my cheeks heat up happily whenever I thought about our promise, I didn't care about the kidnapping at all for a moment and was willing to forget it for him. I loved him, I love you Eddie.

When I opened my eyes again I felt like I wanted more to make me smile, I was already spoiled and given this lovely garden, but I want to see more of outside. I've already accepted staying here with Eddie, but I also miss nature so much. I wanted just a peek. I remembered last time I accidentally cut my knee when trying to look over the fence, I won't be as clumsy this time. I stare at the door for a moment, wondering if I had time, I didn't want Eddie to catch me peeking. I quickly decided I had enough time.