I thankfully made it home before my dad, I didn't know where he could currently be but my guess would be at the church trying to figure out what the hell went wrong with the son he never had. And his answer was probably as good at mine, I was what was wrong with Sammy.
I practically dragged my drained body to my room and immediately becoming annoyed at the mess on my bed. My room looked that same as I left it, it looked like I was in a hurry to disappear. Which wasn't necessarily wrong. I pushed the mountain of clothes off my bed and taking its place ready to give my body the very needed emotional and physical break.
The idea of sleep seemed pretty unrealistic. My mind raced with several things but most importantly with the thought of leaving Oakland. The life that I had created here was one I begun to like and of course any chance of happiness I could obtain my dad was right there to make sure I never had it long enough.
I jumped from my train of thoughts at the sound of the front door slamming. Now I wish I could sleep. I closed my eyes trying to let sleep run through my body but my body rejecting it entirely. The mess around me kept me awake. The physical mess and the emotional one.
I slowly lifted myself off from the bed and staring on the floor at my suitcases, not even a complete one was full. I wondered what was in Georgia for me to find? Who or what was there to even begin an interest in?
With a frustrated groan I pulled my phone out my jacket pocket and viewing the few messages. Jack and Sammy's contact name were the top two, which was exactly the type of metaphor I needed in my life. I feuded between who's to even open first before turning my read recipes off completely, if I didn't like what I seen then it'll appear as it never happened.
I decided on Sammy's first, it made complete sense. Jack and I already said goodbye and had our last moment. Sam and I, not so much.
It was a bible verse, I would've guessed it too.
"Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins. -Peter 4:8"
And the second text : neither of us are saints.
I playfully rolled my eyes at the text itself before switching over to Jack's. He sent a picture, apparently it had been the police report his dad filled out from out first night at the peak but didn't actually report it or send it through. I laughed at the image, a very brief reminder that there was a time before Jack and I had confessed feelings and did the unthinkable.
I placed my phone under my thigh once I heard the soft three knocks at my bedroom door, thank god it was my mom. She popped her head in looking around at the mess before finding me sitting on the edge of my bed appearing as if I was going to do something about it.
She smiled lightly, "I picked up iced coffee."
She pushed open the door revealing the iced beverage making me smile a bit at the gesture and taking the cup from her. I thanked her while setting it onto my nightstand, definitely was going to need that caffeine boost later.
"Have you finished packing?" She asked now looking at the other empty suitcases, "Grandma said she has a room set up for you and everything. You'll love it in Georgia, the weather can be very nice."
"Great, the first thing I want to do when I get out there is get sunburn."
Her smile faded before she sighed crossing her arms over her chest, "Have you tried talking to you dad?"
I laughed a bit, "I think the question is, will he listen?"
"Of course he will, his job as a pastor is to listen." She reassures although it didn't help, "It's just hard for him. He's watching everything he tried to contain finally break free, it's all new to him. And now with the Sammy fiasco, he's just confused."
"Why is he taking his confusion out on me!?" I practically yell. My mixed feelings towards my dad were going to make my head explode, love thy parents, I know, but how can I when he's making it impossible to even live under the same roof as him, "Mom, I don't want to go."
I could see the sadness wash over her face at the thought of me getting onto a flight and leaving Oakland. Leaving my family, my friends, the life that I created here. She gently grabbed one of my shoulders and pulling me into a gentle hug stroking my hair and back.
"I know baby." She whispered now pulling in tighter, "In the end it could be for the better. I mean think of all the new people you're going to meet, you're such a sweet girl, who wouldn't want to be your friend?"
Thank god she was still hugging me because the severe eye roll would've made her resent me as much as my dad did.
I didn't want new friends, I didn't want to meet anybody, and clearly being a sweet girl had gotten me no where. If you would've told me two months ago that my dad was shipping me off to Georgia because not only did I have sex with somebody but cheated on my boyfriend and the my boyfriend outing me and my friends to the entire church, I would've laughed in your face.
But look who was laughing now. Absolutely nobody. Maybe Kami from her ice cream booth.
"Ill try to get through his thick skull but you need to get packed before your dad gets home." She said breaking away from the hug.
She finally left the room once again leaving me to my own thought, thoughts that I didn't want to let roam anymore. But with nothing to look forward to anymore I started separating my clothes and throwing them into their designated suitcases.
Packing an entire life at Oakland into three small bags.
***
I've been listening to too much cigarettes after sex so please don't mind if anything in this chapter and the next few are greatly exaggerated.
Anyways, opinions?
