Promises (Jack Gilinsky)

Chapter 56

Charlotte's POV:

I watch as Jack's parents aproach us. They probably just spent the last hour talking to doctors about their son and my boyfriend.

Me, along with the rest of our group, have been sitting here, not even daring to look at eachother. But, I'm hoping that there is some news that will make this all a little better.

Jack's parents sit down in some chairs in the middle of the room where they can see us all. But, nobody really looks at them,we all just keep our eyes down.

"So," Mr. Gilinsky starts, "we talked to the doctors, and they let us see Jack."

This catches my attention. I look up, along with the others, waiting for them to continue.

"I'm won't lie, he doesn't look good. He's pretty beaten up. But, the doctors have given permission for visitors."

I feel my shattered heart lift a little bit. Just the thought of seeing Jack makes me happy, no matter how messed up the situation is.

"Only one person is not allowed at a time, so you guys can figure it out." Mrs. Gilisnky says. It's amazing how she's kept her composure so well this whole time.

I look around at the guys and I see them all looking at me.

"You should go Charlotte." Nash says.

"What?" I ask. "Why me, you guys have known him a lot longer than I have."

"Yes but you guys are happier when you're together." Shawn says. "Its obvious that you need him more than we do right now."

Looking around, I see everyone nodding their heads in agreement with Shawn and Nash.

"Okay," I say reluctantly. I stand up and slowly make my way toward the entrance of the ICU. I should be begging to be the first to go in, not scared. I just don't think I'm mentally prepared for this.

As I go to the private room where I know Jack is, my heart beats faster. I can feel my breath get shaky and my stomach gets an uneasy feeling. I aproach the door and reach up for the handle. I watch as my trembling fingers open the door.

I really didn't think this through. What if I can't take it? What if seeing him in this condition makes me lose it? Oh well, too late to turn back now.

I slowly push the door open, stepping in. What I see is more than I can handle.

I don't see my boyfriend. I don't see the boy that awlays made me feel good about myself. I don't see the person whose smile could turn my day around. Instead, I see the shell of him.

There are wires attached to every open surface on his skin. He's hooked up to more machines than I can count. I see bruises and scratches all over his body, and I'm forced to stop. I need to take a deep breath before I can go any further, because I know that I might break down any second.

When I feel calm enough, I approach the hospital bed. I take a seat in the chair next to it, careful not to bump anything.

Examining his face, I see little spots of dried blood, no doubt left from broken glass. I carefully reach up to try and it off, but I can't bring myself to it.

I just don't feel right being in here. My mind is making me think that I'm looking at a complete stranger, not the person I love. But, I know that it's him. and I know that he can hear me. He knows I'm here.

"Hey Jack." I say quietly with a sheepish smile. "It's me."

For some reason, I expect a response, but I don't get one. So, I continue.

"Well we're all here. Me, Johnson, Mahogany, Sam..... everybody."

I keep trying to think of things to say, but it's becoming very difficult. So, I turn off the filter that I know is on in my brain. I reach up and take one of Jack's hand in both of mine and continue.

"Jack, I know you can hear me. So please, listen to me. I'm so sorry this happened. If I hadn't been so stupid in the first place, then we wouldn't be in this mess. I know that it's all my fault, but you have to know that I'm sorry, ok?"

I pause for a second, trying to recollect my thoughts. I feel the stinging sensation in my eyes, indicating that I'm about to start crying, but I try my best to ignore it.

"I know that whatever you're feeling right now has to suck, but please, don't give up. Not yet. I know that it would just be easiest to let go of everything and just leave this all behind, but please don't. You can't. You have so many people here that care about you. I mean, there is a waiting room full of your friends and family. We all love you too much to let you go. Especially me, Jack. I love you. I always have from the day I met you. Everything that we've been through together has made me a better person, and it's all because of you. I love you so fucking much it hurts to even think about life without you. If you left, I don't think I could live this life anymore. I won't give up on you. I can't."

By this point, my face is moist from tears. My eyes haven't moved away from Jacks face this whole time, and I don't want them to. I don't want to have to leave him alone. Not now. But, I know that I can't stay here forever.

So, I build up all the courage that I can find and let go of his hand. Slowly, I stand up and make my way towards the exit.
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A/n:

Okay I like legit started crying just thinking about how I'm going to write this whole situation but idk I'll find a way to do it

Anyways yeah I'll try to write some more this week if i have time but please don't get mad if I don't