Save me Romeo (bxb)

Chapter 1 - A new Beginning

A/N: This story contains strong language and sensitive topics. Its a bxb story, so if you have a problem with that, first of fuck you and second, you may leave this story now. Everything here is pure fiction. Hate comments will be deleted. Enjoy❤️🌈

I took a deep breath. The person starring back at me in the mirror seemed so unfamiliar. The stress was clearly showing in my blue eyes and I inched closer to get a better look at myself. My hands traced over my face, trying to feel that that was actually me. That boy in the mirror was me, Blake Jenkins and not some weak pussy I didn't know and would most probably despite for being this insecure and anxious. Why was I so freaking nervous? Its going to be fine. No one knows me here, no one knows about the "Incident". I can start fresh. Finally.

I exhaled sharply and threw myself on my bed, face first. I hated this feeling. All I ever wanted was to be great. I didn't want to cause my family any troubles, I didn't want to have panic attacks and I really just wanted to live a normal life. Maybe I shouldn't go. I should just drop out of school and work at Starbucks. Fuck me, I am really not ready to go to school today. Or ever. All those eyes on me, the questions. Trying to make new friends or maybe real friends this time, was just stressing me out. I screamed into the pillow and turned around to face the ceiling. This was hell. 

"You ready to go?"

I was suddenly ripped out of my fearful thoughts, when I heard that very question. The question I had no answer to, because truthfully, the answer was no. But I didn't allow myself to have that answer. My eyes darted away from the ceiling, as I met my brothers gaze. Cody stood in my room, leaning against the doorframe with a little worry filling his eyes. I didn't even hear him enter. Deep breaths Blake, you can do this. I nodded and slowly got up to take my backpack. As I tried to leave the room, Codys arm hits my chest to stop me from rushing past him.

"Are you ok?" he asked, frowning a little, as if he was trying to read me. I didn't like it. 

"Sure," I snapped. I didn't want to act like a little bitch, but I mean, really? Are you ok? Of course I am not ok, of all the people in this world, he should know that! How could I possibly be even close to ok? 

Cody sighed and let me rush out of the room. I ran down the stairs feeling sick. Maybe I should just stay at home. Maybe I really wasn't ready. But I had to be stronger than that. I couldn't worry mom. It wouldn't be fair. After all we've been through, I can't worry her. Not today anyway. She would immediately call in sick for work and stay home with me, no matter how hard I would try to convince her to just leave me here alone. And she was still new at her job, she couldn't do that. So no, I can't stay home. Fuck.

"Good Morning sunshine! I made you your favorite breakfast - Pancakes" she chirped. Why was she such a morning person? The delicious smell coming from the pan hit my nostrils, making my stomach grumble in delight. My hand clutched over it, feeling my defined abs, that I have been building up again over those past few weeks. I hated my body so much, I know it sounds dumb. Not because I wanted to be thinner or shit, no. It had just caused me too much trouble in the past. As much as I wanted to stuff my face, I tasted sick in my mouth from being way too anxious. 

"Uhm no thanks mom, I think I will just grab a coffee"

"But its your first day at your new school! You have to eat something honey. Or are you not feeling well? Blake, if you are not ready for this thats fine, I can stay home and-"

"I am fine", I lied, "You are right mom, I will just take my pancakes to go, ok? I just don't want to be late, thats all"

She still looked concerned. And who could blame her? This summer was just as hard on her, as it was on Cody and, of course, me. She deserved to be happy.