Love in the Fast Lane (Paul Walker Fanfiction)

Thirty Eight / Trust Issues

{unedited}

January 13th, 2011

"Paul! Meadow! It's time to go!" I grab my keys and my purse then walk to the front door, waiting on my two favorite slowpokes. My hand drops down to my stomach, rubbing softly where the baby would be. This baby might grow up to be a slowpoke just like his or her father. In fact, I hope it's a boy and that he takes after his father, because he is such a wonderful man.

Meadow walks in, looking as beautiful as always. Paul, on the other hand, jumps in on one foot, trying to put his shoe on.

"I'm sorry I'm running late. Someone didn't wake me up this morning." Paul shoots a glare at me.

I shrug. "I woke you up, you just didn't want to get up." He always has the hardest time getting out of bed. I can't complain much though. The way he looks while he's sleeping makes my insides go crazy. But then again, my insides go crazy over him no matter what.

We walk outside. That gut feeling I get when something is going on feels pretty strong right now. My anxiety levels shoot up as I glance around me. I've been looking around me regularly ever since I thought I saw someone at Tyrese's. I stop dead in my tracks when I spot a truck just like Jake's right across the road. It even has the same stickers on the back window. My heart sinks to my feet, a lump forming in my throat. This can't be happening.
Paul and Meadow walk past me to his truck. He stops when he notices me not moving, confusion etched on his face. "Love, what's wrong?"

I don't reply. Not because I don't want to, but because I can't. It feels as if all air has left my body and I can't breathe. There is no way that I can be imagining a truck parked not 15 feet away from me. He's here. Paul grabs my hand, squeezing it, wanting an answer. The truck starts and I find my breath again. I have to get them out of here. Just as I am fixing to speak, however, the driver's side window rolls down. There is no Jake in the truck.

Breathing a huge sigh of relief, my eyes finally meet Paul's. I couldn't think of any explanation off the top of my head. "Nothing." He wouldn't press the issue since Meadow is standing right there, so I know it will have to be discussed later.

Paul puts his arm around me. "Okay. We have a busy day ahead of us. Best get going."

The car ride to take Meadow to school is usually how it is. We always jam to music, with Paul singing badly on purpose to start his daughter's day off with a smile. He never fails to achieve that. While he is in the middle of singing an 80s song, I place my hand on my stomach. I wonder silently about what it would be like taking our child to school. By the time he or she starts school, Meadow will be driving herself. Even though it will be amazing to see them grow up, I hope that day stays away for a while. I can't imagine how I'll feel when that day does come.

Once we arrive at Meadow's school, she practically jumps out of the truck, barely mumbling a goodbye. All I can do is laugh. I'm really glad that she has made friends this quickly, and that she is happy. We watch her walk off to a group of girls, hugging some of them. Paul almost drives off before Meadow runs back.

He rolls down the window. "Are you forgetting something?"

Meadow rolls her eyes and smiles. "Yes. I love you, Dad. And I love you, Sierra." Since Meadow's first day of school here, she would tell us that before she left. It warmed my heart. Despite Paul's own negative thoughts about his parenthood, he has done a great job raising her.

We both tell her that we love her, then we are off. Paul pulls onto the freeway and grabs my hand. "Are you nervous?" He brings my hand to his lips and kisses it. Nervous is an understatement. Millions of concerns and thoughts were running through my mind. What if the heartbeat wasn't there? What if something was wrong with the baby? I won't be able to handle it if something is wrong. Not after our sweet baby girl went to Heaven. I barely got through that. "Hey," Paul whispers, squeezing my hand. "Everything will be okay."