I’m sorry I’m not there with you. I’m so sorry. I don’t want you to feel worst then you already are. Honestly believe me when I say that I have tried to get to you I have tried with everything to explain to this deflated mushrooms. They refuse to understand.
They treat your relationship like a joke. They laughed behind my back. But to hell with them. I’m done asking there help. I’ll turn to Allah.
He understands everything. He knows everything. He will help us get back to each. He always has brought us back to each other. And I am grateful to him. I’ll try to be better everyday because of him.
Yesterday, I cried for the whole half of the day. I cried because I felt like these people are making me out to be a lair. You are the last person I would want to lie to. I don’t want to be a lair. They made me feel guilty.
They made me feel like I had to be fake with you. I mean they turned the truth I told into a lie. I said I’d be there for you. And I couldn’t. It made me sad. I was crying. I hate crying. It makes me a monster. Turn me into some evil creature. It is not the fuck cute. It is so fucking ugly. I hate cry.
But he saved me. Allah saved me. I had asked that day. What am I missing? Why is nothing I do helping me? Why did every plan I execute fail? Why was I losing this battle? I had always trusted that my heart beats to win. Was my heart failing this time? Why?
The answer came with the athen. It said “come to success”. I had always heard it. But I never listened. I had to listen. I have to listen this time. I want to succeed. So Allah make me a success. Make me a winner. Help me please. You know everything. You know what is in my heart. So help me please.
I hate that I had to only realise now if only I had listen early. I would have been there for you. But I have the strong ability to not give up. No matter how of a joke our relation might seem to this deflated mushrooms.
I will not give up on you. You must not give up on me. And you most definitely must not give up on yourself. I love you.
I’ll be there sooner or later. I’ll not give up on you. So please don’t give up on yourself.
YOU ARE READING
knowing just how to love you
PoetryLetters to a loved one is so rare in the twentieth century. Rare like their friendship. Zubaidah writes letters. Zubaidah writes letters to her best friend Uzair. She speaks her mind in them. She loves writing them. It makes her feel special and imp...
